Category Archives: Friendship

Good Without God?

Good Without God?

Can you be “good” without needing a God? Think again.

by Ellsworth Johnson, Guest Blogger

1) Acts

It’s Christmas Day morning. A young boy bursts into the living room of his spacious suburban home, where a beautifully-decorated tree dominates its surroundings by the window. Under the tree are numerous presents bearing, among others, the child’s name. The parents who put up the tree and supplied the gifts are still comfortably asleep in bed, after spending all night preparing this wondrous setting.

The child runs to the tree and immediately begins opening his presents, ripping off wrapping paper and casting it aside. A race car! The latest video game! And finally… his own CELL PHONE!

They are good gifts. And he was a good boy all year, so of course he deserves them! After all, he wasn’t like Johnny Booker, shooting his neighbor’s dog with a BB gun and blinding it in one eye, or those older kids who regularly stole stuff from stores down at the mall.

He plays with the race car and begins to set up his phone. Nowhere in his thoughts of the moment are the parents who gave him the gifts, or that they chose to give them to him despite his ongoing tendencies to “talk back” to them, and not do his chores…

==============================

In the last decade there has been a push in the humanist/atheist community to establish a belief system where the value of morality is recognized and affirmed without having to attribute it, or anything else, to a divine Creator.

A manifesto for this way of thinking is a 2009 book by Greg Epstein, Good Without God: What a Billion Nonreligious People Do Believe.  In the book, Epstein does not seek to destroy traditional religion, but instead supplant it, positing that what is “good” about humanity does not depend on faith in a divine being.

In fact, the author is a great proponent of secular humanism, the principle that humanity is capable of morality and self-fulfillment without belief in God. It specifically rejects religious dogma and supernaturalism as means of morality and decision making.

An entire ecosystem has been built to bolster this viewpoint. Like-minded authors have come alongside Epstein with supporting works of their own. A Web site, Kids Without God, seeks to steer the younger crowd away from the need to rely on anything outside of themselves.

There is even  the Council for Secular Humanism, “North America’s leading organization for non-religious people” to “advocate and defend a nonreligious lifestance rooted in science, naturalistic philosophy, and humanist ethics and to serve and support adherents of that lifestance.”

The race car, given a good strong push, zips along its merry way along a flat surface. Soon, however, it comes to an incline and slows… and in fact rolls back down the way it came, almost back to where it started.

==============================

The attempt to claim life is “good without God” is similar to the above illustration with the toy car. You WILL occasionally and randomly get good pushes and zoom along for a while, but soon you’ll run out of your own power and stop, or hit a hill and roll back down. Worse, with no one all-seeing at the steering wheel, the car could easily hit a wall or go over a cliff.

Things may seem “good” for a while, in fits and starts, but that’s a pretty low standard compared to what’s available. How much better are the gifts that God gives — wisdom, discernment, comfort and guidance in times of trouble, and a peace which passes all understanding — than the perishable things we receive from this world?

Maybe it should be called “life has been OK so far, and doesn’t hurt too badly for me to complain, without God.” And if that’s good enough for you, enjoy that life for all it’s worth, because what comes afterward is guaranteed to be decidedly less pleasant.

The difference is that, with God, you are not limited to your own power, or the fickle vagaries of those in your sphere, but instead can depend on the inexhaustible resources of the Creator of the universe. Through Him, you keep getting pushed along by that mighty hand when you run low on momentum:

“But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”

Isaiah 40:31

Now, in your own travels through this world, you’ll have to trust Him to take the wheel of your car and drive where you need (but not always want) to go, often not an easy thing for many of us to do. You will encounter some rough roads, sometimes travel by night and occasionally take some long detours, but the ultimate end of the journey is guaranteed to make that leap of faith worthwhile.

How much better than the “OK without God” life, then, would it be, instead of rolling back downhill, or getting out and pushing the car yourself, to instead glide over the summit and down the other side with someone driving who knows where He is going, and move along as needed just fine without energy or effort from you?

2) Judges

Unbeknownst to the young boy, the parents in fact are awake in their bedroom, aroused by the playful noises emanating from the front of the house. Dad is angry because the boy did not wait until the entire family was up before opening the gifts, as has traditionally been done in their household.

“Not even a ‘thank you’ from that ungrateful little snot!” he mutters. He wants to get out his belt and “teach that boy some manners”, but the mother’s patience permits cooler heads to prevail.

“Let’s go talk to him,” she advises. “Give him the chance to realize the error of his ways. We’ll think of a suitable penalty later, like no playing with the new stuff for a week.”

Dad huffs, his momentary wrath subsided. He really wants to confront his son about the boy’s impatience and lack of appreciation for the gifts provided, but realizes that the message will be lost unless delivered when the time is right…

==============================

Justice and mercy are two sides of the same coin in God’s economy. The father would be justified in giving the boy a good tanning with the belt, but relents when the mother suggests a different approach, which could have more-desirable long-term effects.

In the first chapter of the book of Romans, Paul lays out God’s unimpeachable indictment against humanity in the starkest terms: man failed to acknowledge God for who He is and the good things He provided, earning us His divine wrath. He gave man over to a Godless existence, mired in his own lusts and devices, the first steps on the road to an eternity in Hell.

The only “off-ramp” from that road is found in Jesus Christ, whose death on the cross opened man’s only way back to God, by appropriating Christ’s righteousness for ourselves and, in the process, turning aside God’s well-deserved anger directed at us “while we were yet sinners”.

Just like the boy enjoying his presents, we are many times blissfully oblivious to the justifiable fury kindling elsewhere against us.

3) Lamentations

Finally, the last member of the family was awake.

“Dude!” the boy’s older sister exclaimed as she entered the living room. “You’re making enough noise to wake the dead!” Her protest landed on deaf ears as playtime continued unabated.

“I see that you couldn’t wait to open your presents,” she said sharply, rolling her eyes. She plopped down in a plush armchair near the Christmas tree and sat back, folding her legs underneath her body.

“Aren’t they incredible? I really hit the jackpot with Mom and Dad this year!”

“I’m sure they are nice, but I’m just as sure they would have loved to see your excitement as you opened your gifts.”

The comment registered for an instant, evidenced by a pause in pushing the race car around the floor, and a brief cessation of engine noises from the boy’s mouth.

“They’ll get over it,” shrugged the boy. He resumed pushing the car and making engine noises. The moment had passed.

Time to shift gears.

“You sure seem to take a lot for granted, especially on this day that we are to appreciate the things we have.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?” He did not look up when asking the question.

“Well, what about the fact that we have a nice big house? We could have a smaller one, like the Carluccis next door…”

“… or have that mansion on the hill, like Scott Hendel’s family has,” countered her brother.

“Or be living in a cardboard box on the street.” The reversal itself had been reversed, and her brother’s naked covetousness irritated her, yet something in her heart spurred her on.

“My friend Jenny, she and her family decided to forego giving each other gifts this year, and instead use the money to get stuff for other people in their lives. She decided to buy presents for her teachers at school. Her parents got stuff for their co-workers, and I think her brother surprised his basketball team with … whatever it is that basketball players like.”

The boy pondered that thought for a moment. “That was pretty nice of them. I’ll bet all those people were pretty happy to get all that stuff.”

“They were. And it made Jenny and her family feel even better to give it.”

The girl sighed. Another attempt to take flight had been allowed to fall back to earth. She had been awoken that morning not by the noise in the living room, but the need to bring her brother’s ongoing selfish behavior under repentance. So far, all her efforts had failed.

Then, finally, enduring inspiration struck.

“Remember when you tried to steal that candy down at Walmart?”

The boy hesitated for a moment. He had stopped playing with the race car and had started to configure the phone. “Yeah. That was probably wrong…”

“‘Probably’? The store clerk who caught you was pretty sure when she told Mom.”

“I could not go outside and play after school for a week,” he recalled. Then he smiled. “But that was OK: I stayed inside and played Halo on my Xbox. Even got a high score!” The boy was proud of himself.

His triumph, however, was short-lived.

“What about the second time, with Dad?”

The boy was stunned, enough so that he put down the cell phone.

“Aha!” the sister declared triumphantly. “You didn’t know I KNEW about that one, did you??? Mom told me what happened, as well as what Dad did about it.”

This was a less-sanguine memory. The boy had been with his father at a hardware store when he decided on a whim to steal a box of Junior Mints at the checkout stand. The store manager happened to be on the floor at the time and confronted the boy, who, at the manager’s behest, led him to the father. Dad was clearly embarrassed, and, the boy could tell, more than a little angry. Dad apologized to the manager, and made the boy say that he, too, was sorry.

Memories of the ride home, and the later beating, gave the boy chills. Dad didn’t say much beyond muttered threats, letting the dread of anticipation build. When they got home, Mom wasn’t there to shield him from the punishment; out came the belt and the boy got a thorough whipping.

“I had to write a letter to the manager, and deliver it in person,” recalled the boy, decidedly downcast. “I had to say that stealing is wrong, and I was sorry. It was quite embarrassing.”

“Sorry that you did it? Or sorry you got caught?”

“That I did it.” And then, in a flash, the boy became quite defensive.

“Just because you are thirteen doesn’t make you somehow better than me!”

“True, ” the girl replied pensively. “It does not. But it DOES make me ask questions, and think about things nine-year-old boys don’t.”

Embarrassed, the boy went back to playing with his car, but now in silence and with a lot less joy.

==============================

It’s true: the deep dark sins we commit in secret will all eventually come out. In fact, Jesus Himself declared this much in Luke’s gospel:

But there is nothing covered up that will not be revealed, and hidden that will not be known. Accordingly, whatever you have said in the dark will be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in the inner rooms will be proclaimed upon the housetops.

Luke 12:2-3

God, of course, already knows all about our transgressions: He knew about them before they took place, and had a front-row seat when they actually occurred. It is also possible that others, unbeknownst to you, already know about them as well, tainting those relationships and coloring the judgments they make toward you, all without your knowledge.

4) Revelation

The boy’s remorse over opening his presents early had become oppressive. What should have been a morning of delight and celebration had instead for him become burdensome and guilt-ridden. He continued tinkering with the cell phone, but his heart and mind were elsewhere.

There was no “un-ringing the bell” here: what’s done was done, and the only question worth addressing was what to do next.

“If it were me,” the sister offered, “I’d go in and throw myself on Dad’s mercy.” By now she had settled into the armchair and slung her legs over one arm, sitting sideways. “That always worked for me: admit you made a mistake, promise that you won’t do it again and that you’ll do better in the future.”

“That’s it?”

“Well, yeah, but there’s one catch.”

“I KNEW it!” he declared triumphantly. “I knew there’d be one. That sounds WAY too easy! So, what is it?” A smirk had appeared on his face, as if he had uncovered a secret hidden truth.

“You have to mean it.”

The boy snorted his disbelief.

“It’s true,” his sister continued. “He knows when you’re just saying the words. Believe me, I tried just going through the motions a couple times. I still got lashed with the belt.”

“YOU? Miss Goody-Goody got a beating?” He found this even more incredible, that his apparently angelic sister had ever done anything meriting punishment.

“Yep. That was a long time ago, before I learned that is was good to be honest when you mess up, but even better to not do bad things in the first place. Believe me, I am not perfect, by any stretch, but I do try to be better every day.”

Now the boy contemplated his own situation: if he waited for Dad to come out of the bedroom into the living room, chances were he’d be carrying a strap of leather, and not for decoration, either. On the other hand, a heartfelt pre-emptive apology just might turn aside his father’s wrath.

“Maybe I should try that. It sounds a lot less painful that Dad’s belt.”

“Yes, it does work out better most of the time. But remember, you can’t just mouth the words. When I did that, it didn’t just make him a little angrier, but also very sad. The belt hurt, to be sure, but what I remember most is the look of disappointment on his face. That stung more than the belt did.”

Tears started to well up in the boy’s eyes. “I don’t want Daddy and Mommy to be disappointed in me!”

“I’m sure they don’t want that, either. But you need to tell them the truth about what happened, that you got too excited and forgot to wait for everyone else to get up before opening your presents. They deserve a sincere apology — remember, you gotta mean it. Think you can do that?”

The boy nodded in silence.

“Come on. Let’s go wish Mom and Dad a Merry Christmas.”

With that, they set out for the master bedroom. With a knock on the closed door met by a shouted “Come in!” the children burst into the room and leaped on the bed, squeezing and snuggling in the space between their parents, just as they used to do long ago. Their bodies may now be bigger, but, inside, a part of each was still the small child who felt safe, loved and secure when curling up with Mommy and Daddy.

The business of opening the gifts without the family present was handled gracefully. Heartfelt phrases were exchanged: “Thank you.” “I’m sorry.” “We forgive you.” The parents decided upon a fair nonphysical punishment.

With that out of the way, there was nothing left to do but to enjoy the moment on the bed, together, as a family.

==============================

What It All Means

The story is an allegory developed around the situation we as Christians face when confronted with an adherent of the “Good Without God” philosophy.

The brother is the obvious (and oblivious!) sinner who thinks he’s already pretty good, at least compared to other people, and does not need additional boundaries on his behavior. The parents represent the dual nature of God, with the father holding honest indignation over his wayward child’s “me first” rush to playtime, along with the desire to inflict punishment, and the mother tempering that judgment with patience.

Stuck in the middle of all this is the sister, who is clearly somehow enlightened to there being more to life than the self-centered focus her brother has, and is trying to get him to put their situation into a larger context. Twice she fails, but does not give up, finally finding an “in” when confronting him about how his actions probably made his parents feel. In the end, she leads him into the parents’ bedroom, where he honestly confess his “sin” and asks for forgiveness, which is immediately and lovingly granted.

In short… she evangelizes him!

In the ideal, our earthly parents mirror and model God’s love for us, but also His judgment and righteous anger when warranted. In the end, it is far more preferable to “come clean” and admit our transgressions to a God who made us, already knows our weaknesses and mistakes, and stands ready to forgive us in His Son’s name.

Have you given your life over to Jesus Christ? If you have, were you genuinely sorry for the sins you committed, or did you simply make a vain confession devoid of feeling? If you have not, there is still an opportunity to turn aside the eminently justifiable anger a holy God has against you, and exchange it for forgiveness and a place in His kingdom forever.

The Rest of the Story

At that moment, in a realm far away, the Creator was, in fact, looking in on this family.  He smiled, as things were progressing exactly how He had intended.

“This is how I roll!” He smiled to Himself, in ways far beyond our understanding.

Two more miracles were needed to tear the lid off this family’s godless paradigm once and for all, in a way which none of them could deny. The groundwork for each had already been laid, here and elsewhere, and in the fullness of time those happenings will point to the Source of All Things.

The Creator already knew whether and how each member of the family would eventually respond, for it had been ordained since the beginning of time.

The only thing left to do… was wait.

==============================

What is God waiting for each of us to do? Reach out to someone? Respond to Him in some way? Are there people around us who believe they are “good without God?”

Whatever it may be, we should be honored that we have been appointed to be part of His eternal plan to bring rightful glory to Himself, and share His love for His beloved children the world over.

Prayer:

Father, let those who believe life is “good” without You be awakened from their slumber to all which is possible with You. Open their eyes, Lord, and their hearts to You and Your endless grace, and show them unmistakably that life is indeed “better WITH God”. You have a storehouse for each of us, filled with Your gifts and mercies, only a small fraction of which is ever claimed during our lifetimes. Help us receive what You have already set aside for us. I ask in the holy and precious name of your Son Jesus. Amen.

Bible Verses:

Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”

Genesis 1:26

” The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’ They are corrupt, their deeds are vile; there is no one who does good.”

Psalm 14:1

“The LORD saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time.”

Genesis 6:5

“Without Me, you can do nothing.”

John 15:5

“Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow.”

James 1:17 (NLT)

“I say to the LORD, ‘You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing.’”

Psalm 16:2

Bible verses are from the New International Version (NIV) unless stated otherwise.

Credit:©Lightstock/KevinCarden116894

My Seven Most Favorite Thanksgiving Bible Verses

Happy Thanksgiving!

Over the years, I have only missed one Thanksgiving with my mom and/or my dad. That was the year we moved from Kingwood/Houston, Texas to St. Peters/St. Louis, Missouri in November 1992. If you knew my age, that is a lot of Thanksgivings spent with my parents. My mom’s house has been the “go-to house” for all our family holidays.

Being the photo enthusiast that I am, I have multiple pictures of Thanksgiving food from various occasions held at my parent’s home. Today, I am thankful I can share these pictures of our Thanksgiving meals, along with my special Bible verses.

You see, Mom just turned 93-years-old. I am thankful our family still has her as our matriarch. My father passed away three years ago.

In addition, I am grateful for all the good family times we have had over my lifetime celebrating Thanksgiving—even when we lived in England!

Mom, in your honor, I share your love of cooking with the world!

I love you and thank you for everything you have done for your family.

1. Let us come to Him with thanksgiving . . . (Psalm 95:2)

2. I have not stopped giving thanks for you in my prayers. (Ephesians 1:16)

3. This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)

4. I thank my God every time I remember you. (Philippians 1:3)

5. Give thanks to the Lord for He is good . . . (1 Chronicles 16:34)

6. Give thanks in all circumstances for this is God’s will for you. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

7. Give thanks to the Lord, call on His name. (Isaiah 12:4)

Happy Thanksgiving my friends. Thanks for being part of the Greene Pastures Blog Family.

greenenpastures.org

Our Motives, Intentions and Attitudes [Toward Others]—Part 2

I’ll never forget it. My first thought was, “What was his motive or motives for such a horrendous act?”

In 2009, the New York Times reported that Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan, a military psychiatrist, shot and killed 13 people and wounded more than 30 others at the Fort Hood Army base in Central Texas. ¹

Last week, I wondered about the motives of whoever was sending package bombs to media and political figures around the country.

Fortunately, the police and FBI arrested Cesar Sayoc, 56, of South Florida as the prime suspect in the bomb mailings. Based on evidence collected so far, his motive appears to be extreme hatred of left-learning politicians and public figures.

Being a sociology major, I am extremely interested in what makes people tick. Crime shows fascinate me. In these shows, the question of motives always comes up either in the show or within my own mind.

Why Do We Want to Know a Person’s Motive?

  • To indulge our curiosity;
  • To know how to prevent future civil or moral disobedience;
  • To judge others;
  • To know how we can help solve others’ problems through acts of kindness; or
  • To pray for them.

In my blog titled Our Motives, Intentions, and Attitudes – Part 1, we discussed how to analyze our own motives. In Part 2, we will be looking into how we judge other people’s motives and whether it is right or wrong to do so from a Biblical perspective.

As we approach this topic, let’s remember that as we look upon the motives of others, they are looking back at us with the same inquiring mind, wondering, in turn, what our motives might be. Sometimes it is obvious; other times it is not.

When we judge (or try to analyze) the motives of others, our own belief system, personal experiences, desires, and other peripheral factors always come into play—affecting our perception of others.

Are We Judging Others When We Look at Their Motives?

It depends!

Motives can be good or bad, so we must balance how we view motives very carefully: we can’t always determine the motives of a person just by their behavior, deeds, or talk.

I must admit, when I was in my early twenties, I went to Sunday School to learn about God, but I had a double-motive. I wanted to find some dating possibilities. My motivation was what most Christ-followers can accept—the desire to find and date someone with like spiritual beliefs. While not 100% pure motives were involved, most accept and understand my dual motives.

Scrutinizing others’ motives should entail looking at our fellow human beings with the goal of glorifying God. Our words and thoughts should be gentle and humble—always seeking the best outcome for the other person. In this scenario, we would be looking at others in a righteous manner.

When we look at motives in an unrighteous way, our judgments are usually inconsistent with the way Jesus looks at us. Rudeness, roughness, humiliation and deviating from looking at others through the eyes of our Lord is prevalent today. Just look at many of our current political debates where intolerance and a lack of respect exist.

In 1 Chronicles 19, David was fleeing from King Saul and he received help from the Ammonite King Nahash. Nahash and David teamed up and together took on Saul and his army. Nahash eventually died and David, who succeeded Saul as King of Israel, tried to reach out to Nahash’s son King Hanun, but Hanun and his advisors became leery of David’s motives.

David’s men tried to express sorrow for Nahash’s death. Instead of accepting David’s offer of peace and alliance, Hanun humiliated the envoys by shaving their beards and cutting off their garments in the middle.

If Nahash would have taken the time to confirm David’s intentions, things would have turned out differently. Instead of harmonious relations, war broke out between them, and Israel defeated Nahash’s kingdom in Aram.

It didn’t take long for Hanun to decide that King David was insincere in reaching out to give consolation regarding his father’s death. But, he was dead wrong in his analysis.

King Hanun was easily influenced by his princes. Just like Hanun, we allow our friends, spouses, employees and previous experiences to color our attitudes, knowing full-well that adhering to God’s Word should be the primary motive in guiding our actions. Hanun’s princes should have given him time to think through and evaluate David’s kindness.

Instead they asked:

  • Do you think that David’s servants came to Hanum in the land of the people of Ammon to comfort him?
  • Did you think that David really honors your father because he has sent comforters to you?
  • Did his servants not come to you to search and to overthrow and to spy out the land?

In these questions, we see an unreliable group of people who probably had their own motives and agenda in mind to influence the King.

When we look at others, our mind, soul and spirit should be in alignment with the mind of Christ. Seeking God’s perspective on our psyche, spiritual life, and experiences guides us to a true discernment of a person’s motives; this helps us assist them in becoming in tune with God’s ultimate will for their lives.

Through prayer, the Holy Spirit’s guidance and a deep desire to live in the spiritual realm, we can gain an understanding of the intentions of others—most of the time!

The Bible says,

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned.” (Luke 6:37)

“Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.” (John 7:24)

What Does the Bible Mean When It Says, “We Are Not to Judge Others”?

In an article titled, What does the Bible mean that we are not to judge others? by GotQuestions.org, it says:

  • The Bible’s command that we not judge others does not mean there should be no mechanism for dealing with sin. Christians are often accused of judging or intolerance when they speak out against sin. But opposing sin is not wrong.
  • The Bible’s command that we not judge others does not mean we cannot show discernment. Jesus is giving us permission to tell right from wrong. In Matthew 7:15-16, Jesus said, “By their fruit you will recognize them”—the false prophets.
  • Jesus gives a direct command to judge: Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly. (John 7:24)
  • We are always to be gentle toward everyone. Harsh, unforgiving judgment is wrong. (Titus 3:2)
  • Self-righteous judgment is wrong. We are called to humility, and God opposes the proud. (James 4:6)
  • Untrue judgment is wrong. The Bible says to slander no one. (Titus 3:2)
  • Believers are warned against judging others unfairly or unrighteously, but Jesus commends right judgment. (John 7:24) ²

When sin is involved, discerning the motives of others might be the difference between leading a person back to the Lord or letting him continue in sin, thus having him miss out on God’s best for his life.

One time, a prominent member on the school board of the Christian school where I was employed either didn’t like me or misunderstood my motives. Unfortunately, it resulted in me losing my job. Being unjustly criticized (without recourse) by another purported Christ-follower was an extremely painful experience. In a situation like this, a discussion of the situation would have been very helpful in my understanding the member’s motives and, eventually, my forgiving this action. Instead, long years of speculation have occurred.

Another time, one of my best friends misunderstood why I did not congratulate her and her daughter when they “walked down the aisle” upon her daughter’s acceptance of Christ. I was oblivious to the hurt feelings my friend experienced and how upset she was with me. Providentially, my friend called me up and brought my attention to her hurt feelings; thus, reconciliation occurred immediately.

In the first situation, there was no room for discussion, and years and years have passed where I am still haunted about what happened regarding “being let go” because there was no resolution.

In the second scenario, motives were discussed, handled, forgiven, and we were able to move on to a life-long friendship which is deeper than ever because we learned the correct way to handle it.

Discerning the Motives of Others

Reading others’ motives is a skill.

It’s important to remember that not all people’s motives are bad. Many motives are downright positive, e.g. wanting to help someone be all the Lord wants them to be.

In How to Read People’s Motives by Western Mastery, this article discusses why we might want to discern the motives of others.

Their reasoning is because when we know the motives of others, it helps us to know their intentions, helps us to gain insight, how to respond, and how to address their behaviors; ³

When we want to help others to yield their lives to Christ and to His character, discerning their motives might be just the catalyst the Lord wants to use to change their lives.

Misreading the Intentions of Others

On the other hand, it is extremely easy to make a snap judgment about someone or their behavior. Misreading others’ intentions is quite probable. We can misconstrue why people are jealous, fearful, and/or lazy.

We must be extremely careful not to undermine a person or their behavior without cause.

For instance, jealousy can cause a person to question a comrade’s motives because they might feel that their comrade is taking a rightly-earned place or position which the person believes should have instead been his own. Tragically, misreading motives could lead to future scheming, avoidance or even feeling unduly threatened or resentful in the comrade’s presence. In the workplace, this could culminate in a co-worker believing they deserve the promotion or the higher-paying position when, in fact, they do not deserve either one.

What Should We Do When We Question the Motives of Others?

Let’s face it—we are human beings and we sometimes wonder about the motives of others. It may be a cursory glance or a scrutinizing in-depth evaluation.

Some tips are:

  • Don’t rely on a preconceived notion about others. People change. God DOES change people;
  • Don’t depend exclusively on first impressions or our intuition;
  • Find out all the facts before judging a person’s motives (and especially before addressing them);
  • Put yourself in someone else’s shoes; and
  • If you have misjudged someone, apologize and reconcile as soon as possible.

A person’s background, personality, and life experiences may clash with yours, but that doesn’t make you right all the time and them wrong.

Being raised for most of my formative years in London, England or in the northeastern part of the United States, I may not think like some of my friends who were raised in the deep South. My life experiences and spiritual experiences are different than others, but I hope and pray that my friends and acquaintances will look at me through the eyes of God—instead of through my idiosyncrasies.

And especially not in a judgmental way.

When we depend on the Lord, our thinking about others and their motives will be guided by His light and in His wisdom. When we pursue God, He will show us any behaviors or actions He wants us address. Christian love and compassion should rule in our hearts—not negativity or criticism.

In his blog entry about motives, Joshua Kennon warns: “A final word of caution: I would urge you to consider keeping your thoughts on another person’s motivation to yourself.” ⁴ Until Jesus gives you the spiritual wisdom to discern where a person is coming from, keep your ears and eyes open for when, how or even whether you should speak.

When God gives us His wisdom, He will also give us guidance to know how to spur a person to hear God’s voice and experience a deep passion to follow Christ’s will.

Now, that is not being “judgmental”. Far from it!

It’s being a servant of God.

Bible Verses:

All the ways of a man are clean in his own sight, But the LORD weighs the motives. (Proverbs 16:2)

Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment. (John 7:24)

A man has joy in an apt answer, and how delightful is a timely word! (Proverbs 15:23)

I, the LORD, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give to each man according to his ways, according to the results of his deeds. (Jeremiah 17:10)

Prayer:

Dear Jesus,

I am prone at times to wonder what the thoughts or motives are of others are. I also understand that people, even those I consider friends, question my motives every now and then. I occasionally need my motives questioned and confronted in love. God, please give me Your mind. Give me Your discernment. Give me Your patience. Give me Your ability to speak only when You have led me to do so. Let my life be a replica of You. Lord, I want to represent You in all I do. I really do.

In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless

Member of IWA-Inspirational Writers Alive!

Member of Biblegateway Bloggers #bgbg2

All Bible verses use the New American Standard Version unless otherwise noted.

Edited by E. Johnson

Works Cited

¹ McFadden, Robert D. “Army Doctor Held in Ft. Hood Rampage.” The New York Times, 5 Nov 2009. www.nytimes.com/2009/11/06/us/06forthood.html.

² “What does the Bible mean that we are not to judge others?” Accessed 8 Oct 2018. https://www.gotquestions.org/do-not-judge.html.

³ “How to Read People’s Motives.” Western Mastery. December 28, 2016. Accessed 2018.8 Oct 2018. http://www.westernmastery.com/2016/12/28/understanding-the-motivation-behind-peoples-actions/

⁴ Kennon, Joshua. “To Have a More Successful Life, Understand the Motivations and Motives of Yourself and the People Around You.” Accessed 20 Oct 2018. http://JoshuaKeenan.com/motives-and-motivations-matter.

In addition, I would love for you to join either my blog or newsletter. Just go to GreenePastures.org and look on the upper right-hand side of the blog to join!

Books by Patti Greene: Available on Amazon

Christian Caregiving: Advice for a Happy Ending by Patti Greene

Kindness: A Fruit of the Spirit

Many of us have no idea how to treat others with kindness. As a Christ-follower, following Jesus’ example in the New Testament demonstrates a worthwhile goal to pursue. When Christ’s love and His Holy Spirit indwells us, kindness begins to permeate our thoughts first and then our actions.

When I look back at most of the people I have known in ministry, it is the trait of kindness that sticks in my mind. Many times, I personally received a direct outcome of their kindness or I saw them showering kindness on others.

But, come to think of it, kindness is the trait I look for or it finds me in my relationships with others. (Okay, I value honesty too!)

The trait that you look for or find may be different. It may be another fruit of the Spirit such as love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness or self-control. (Galatians 5:22)

While not exhaustive, some of the pastoral kindnesses I have experienced are . . .

  • The pastor who preached the gospel when I turned from my sin and believed in my Lord Jesus Christ. [Bill Lawson/Wheeler Avenue Baptist Church, Houston]
  • The pastor who counseled me and baptized me. [Dr. James Harris/University Baptist Church, Fort Worth]
  • The pastor who gave me the best marriage advice ever. [Dr. John Bisango, First Baptist Church, Houston]
  • The pastor who filled in to marry us when our intended wedding pastor had to cancel marrying us two days before the wedding. [Dr. James Riley/Former pastor @ Second Baptist, Houston]
  • The interim pastor who loved our 6-year old daughter and led her to Christ and baptized her that very same day. [Bob Harris/Interim @ First Baptist, Humble]
  • The pastor I saw sweeping and cleaning up the kitchen after our daughter’s wedding shower which took place in his church. [Jerry Howe/Second Baptist Church, Levelland at the time]

And, I could go on and on! Fortunately, my husband and I have been recipients of being in wonderful churches all throughout our married life. Each unique in their own way. Praise God!

Kindness from Christ-Followers

But, it’s not the kindnesses I have received just from ministerial people that have impressed me. I have also been the recipient of individual Christ-followers’ kindnesses, like . . .

  • The ladies who brought meals to me after my children were born.
  • The college professor who gave me a passing grade when I shared difficulties I was having grasping the subject matter in his class.
  • The friend who consoled me after a horrendous breakup.
  • The elderly churchmen and churchwomen who mentored my husband and me when we were young adults by their examples and “invitations to have lunch with them.”
  • The friend who rejoiced with me when we bought a home while she lived in a small, rundown apartment with four young children.

Kindness was the trait that attracted me to my husband. When we dated, he was kind (and nice) to me. Need I say more after 39 years of marriage?

The Bible urges us to be kind to one another.

Honestly, I don’t think of myself as a particularly kind person. [Oh, I do not like saying that, but I desire to be a kind person.] When I see my rough and jagged edges, I don’t like what I see. That’s why it surprises me when I receive notes from my friends as I received recently.

One of my friends wrote,

You found me hiding pains and helped my healing: I am the vibrant woman I am today because you stopped where I was stuck, you became the step I needed to climb up and out: I am eternally grateful for your loving kindness.

I cherish comments like this. They encourage me to do better, to strive to be more kind and loving. And I appreciate those who refrain from telling me my bad characteristics until they are told with kind words—words that only the Holy Spirit can place in their hearts.

Moses’ father-in-law Jethro knew how to show grace and kindness when it came time to lead Moses to a better life when Moses was overloaded by all his pastoral duties.

Jethro said,

The thing you are doing is not good. You will surely wear out, both yourself and these people who are with you, for the task is too heavy for you; you cannot do it alone.  Then he began to counsel him and teach him how to handle disputes by having the difficult decisions brought to him and having the minor decisions handled by the judges. (Exodus 18)

Now, that’s kindness in action!

Kindness is one of the fruits of the Spirit. When speaking about walking by the Spirit, Paul states the following, concluding with kindness being one of the fruits of the Spirit:

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please. 

But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the Law. Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things, there is no law.  

Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another (Read Galatians 5:16-26).

Why Should We Be Kind To Each Other?

  • As believers, we are commanded to be kind. (Colossians 3:21)
  • Be kind so that the word of God may not be criticized or attacked. (Titus 2:5)
  • Because the Lord is kind. Psalm 145:17. (Titus 3:4)
  • God tells us to be kind because he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. (Luke 6:35)
  • God’s kindness is meant to lead us to repentance. (Romans 2:4)
  • If you are kind, you will find life, righteousness, and honor. (Proverbs 21:21)
  • The Bible tells us that servants of God should be kind to everyone and not quarrelsome. (2 Timothy 2:24)
  • The Bible tells us to remember people kindly. (1 Thessalonians 3:6)
  • We should be kind to one another as God in Christ forgave us. (Ephesians 4:32)
  • You benefit yourself if you are kind while a cruel man hurts himself. (Proverbs 11:17)

Conclusion

As Christ-followers, no matter what we encounter in life, we are faced with many different situations and personalities. Obviously, sometimes we don’t feel like being kind. Fatigue, restlessness, and/or sin may cause our focus to shift away easily from God and His attributes.

Faced with our sometimes unkind attitudes, we should repent daily and pray that our lives will reflect the love of God in all we do—including being kind. Being kind involves loving others, being patient, and seeking God’s wisdom in all we say and do.

And, when we fail, let’s confess our harsh and callous hearts to God, and start over—even if it means addressing and apologizing to those whom we have hurt.

Bible Verses:

Now in Joppa there was a disciple named Tabitha (which translated in Greek is called Dorcas); this woman was abounding with deeds of kindness and charity which she continually did. (Acts 9:36)

But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. (Luke 6:35)

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32)

Prayer:

Dear Jesus, I so want to be kind. Help me each day to seek Your face and become more like You. Show me how to be kind to both my friends and enemies. Fill me with Your Holy Spirit and guide me to situations where I need to shower others with kindness. Where I need to seek forgiveness, show me how to confess. You are holy and kind and I want to be like You in all I say, think, or do. In Christ. Amen.

God Bless,

Member of IWA-Inspirational Writers Alive!

Member of Biblegateway Bloggers #bgbg2

Edited by E. Johnson

All Because of a Janitor and “One Another” Verses

ALL BECAUSE OF A JANITOR

I attend a weekly Bible study. This week my group met for a casual lunch to love on “one another” and fellowship since we are off for the summer.

May I mention that I am the youngest person in the group (and I’m not telling how old I am.) The age range of the women is probably between 75-95 with me being the exception. You might wonder how I ended up in a group with women so much older than me.

It was all because of a janitor!!! 

On my first day to attend this class, I did not know where the meeting room was located so I asked the janitor—my big mistake or so I thought. He had no idea where I should go or what I was talking about. He just wanted to chat and speculate with me.

Finally, three lovely women walked by and asked if they could help. Long story short, I ended up in their class even though there were about seven or eight different classes in which one or two probably included women close to my own age group.

When I walked in the class that first day, I saw canes, walkers, and wheelchairs. Within a few minutes, I learned there were women there possessing hearing aids, cancer ports, and living with dementia.

I tell you all this to say that God always knows what He is doing. During my  1 1/2 year involvement with this class, I wrote a book titled Christian Caregiving: Practical Advice for a Happy EndingNot that the book was a direct result of this class, but it did give me a little more understanding and compassion for the elderly!

The janitor doesn’t know it, but his elongated speculation and chatter on room location provided for God’s timing so these women could “arrive on the scene.”

I love the ladies in this group and the Bible study. And, I think the group has accepted me (the strangler who invaded their already established group)—at least they acted like it yesterday!

Because of this class, I am a big fan of the books of the Bible we have studied together—1 Samuel, 2 Samuel, and 1 Corinthians!

Now I am eagerly awaiting our next study on the book of John this fall. Awesome!

Moving on . . . 

This week I was listening to a Christian radio program and the speaker discussed the phrase “one another” from the Bible. So, being a curious person, I looked up the phrase and saw that the phrase is mentioned 153 times in the Old Testament and 146 times in the New Testament.

Faced with reading all 299 verses, I opted to read the 146 verses in the New Testament. Many of the verses had to do with speaking to one another, reasoning with one another, calling others for discussion, arguing with one another, and more.

But, for this blog, I decided to pull out some Christian advice and admonitions that are personal attributes for us to remember. I hope you enjoy them and notice how often we are encouraged to love one another!

“One Another” NT Verses

Mark 9:50
Salt is good; but if the salt becomes unsalty, with what will you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with one another.”
been wasted?

Luke 23:12
Now Herod and Pilate became friends with one another that very day; for before they had been enemies with each other.

John 5:44
How can you believe, when you receive glory from one another and you do not seek the glory that is from the one and only God?

John 13:34
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.

John 15:12
[ Disciples’ Relation to Each Other ] “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you.

John 15:17
This I command you, that you love one another.

Acts 4:15
But when they had ordered them to leave the Council, they began to confer with one another,

Acts 21:5
When our days there were ended, we left and started on our journey, while they all, with wives and children, escorted us until we were out of the city. After kneeling down on the beach and praying, we said farewell to one another.

Acts 26:31
and when they had gone aside, they began talking to one another, saying, “This man is not doing anything worthy of death or imprisonment.”

Romans 12:10
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor;

Romans 12:16
Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation.

Romans 13:8
Owe nothing to anyone except to love one another; for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law.

Romans 14:13
Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this—not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way.

Romans 14:19
So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another.

Romans 15:5
Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus,

Romans 15:7
Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.

Romans 15:14
And concerning you, my brethren, I myself also am convinced that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able also to admonish one another.

Romans 16:16
Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ greet you.

1 Corinthians 11:33
So then, my brethren, when you come together to eat, wait for one another.

1 Corinthians 12:25
so that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another.

Galatians 5:13
For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

Galatians 5:15
But if you bite and devour one another, take care that you are not consumed by one another.

Galatians 5:26
Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another.

Galatians 6:2
Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.

Ephesians 4:2
with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love,

Ephesians 4:25
Therefore, laying aside falsehood, SPEAK TRUTH EACH ONE of you WITH HIS NEIGHBOR, for we are members of one another
.

Ephesians 4:32
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

Ephesians 5:19
speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord;

Ephesians 5:21
and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.

Philippians 2:3
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves;

Colossians 3:9
Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices,

Colossians 3:13
bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.

Colossians 3:16
Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God.

1 Thessalonians 3:12
and may the Lord cause you to increase and abound in love for one another, and for all people, just as we also do for you;

1 Thessalonians 4:9
Now as to the love of the brethren, you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another;

1 Thessalonians 4:18
Therefore comfort one another with these words.

1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:13
and that you esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Live in peace with one another.

1 Thessalonians 5:15
See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people.

Hebrews 3:13
But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.

Hebrews 10:24
and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds,

Hebrews 10:25
not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.

James 4:11
Do not speak against one another, brethren. He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks against the law and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge of it.

James 5:9
Do not complain, brethren, against one another, so that you yourselves may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing right at the door.

James 5:16
Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.

1 Peter 1:22
Since you have in obedience to the truth purified your souls for a sincere love of the brethren, fervently love one another from the heart,

1 Peter 4:9
Be hospitable to one another without complaint.

1 Peter 4:10
As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.

1 Peter 5:5
You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE.

1 John 3:1
Children of God Love One Another ] See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and such we are. For this reason the world does not know us, because it did not know Him.

1 John 3:11
For this is the message which you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another;

1 John 3:23
This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us.

1 John 4:7
[ God Is Love ] Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.

1 John 4:11
Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

1 John 4:12
No one has seen God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us.

2 John 1:5
Now I ask you, lady, not as though I were writing to you a new commandment, but the one which we have had from the beginning, that we love one another.

Verses:

See above.

Prayer:

Dear heavenly Father, Please help me to put one or two of the verses above into action this week. Show me how I can serve others. Give me wisdom so I can know you better and be a person who uplifts Your holy name. I love you, Lord. Now let me fervently love others in the power of Your Holy Spirit. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Works Cited:

BibleGateway.com [NASB version]

Chambers, Oswald. My Utmost for His Highest. https://utmost.org/love-one-another. 11 July 2018.

You can sign up for email notifications on blogs and monthly newsletters by going to GreenePastures.org. Look for the sign-in blocks. You will then receive an email to confirm your subscription.

Also, if you found this post helpful, please like it, share it or comment on it so others can get the benefit. Thanks.

What Is A Hoarding Disorder?

One of my relatives is a hoarder, and a friend has two middle-aged sons also affected by this condition known as hoarding. Being someone who loves to research social issues, the topic piqued my interest enough for me to investigate hoarding disorders for myself.

Famous brothers Homer and Langley Collyer, well-known wealthy Manhattan residents, are recognized as hoarders. After the death of their parents in the 1920’s, the two men withdrew from the public. They split their time between the family’s Manhattan residence and their Harlem brownstones.

In 1947, a neighbor notified the police about an overpowering odor coming from their home. When the police arrived, they found Homer, who was blind and crippled, dead and surrounded by trash. David K. Israel, author of “7 Famous Hoarders” said, “His corpse was amid tons of junk, including an early X-ray machine, the jawbone of a horse and bundles upon bundles of old newspapers.”

After a full and lengthy search, Langley’s dead body was found in one of their brownstones, buried by newspapers. His death had occurred weeks before. Israel noted that Langley “had been dead for weeks and rats had eaten most of his body. It was ultimately determined that Homer died of starvation when Langley, who fed his crippled, blind brother, was crushed to death under . . . a bunch of junk.” ¹

History of Hoarding

The study of hoarding is a relatively new study. In the 1990s, many psychologists and neurologists assigned hoarding into the category of an obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) for lack of a better classification. However, owning many possessions makes a person with OCD feel anxious and unnerved while a hoarder finds extreme delight in finding bargains and purchasing a good deal. In 1993, psychology professor Randy Frost at Smith College attempted the first methodical study on hoarding. Now 24 years later, there has been an obsession with TV shows such as TLC’s Hoarding: Buried Alive and A&E’s Hoarders.

Hoarding is a brand-new disorder. In The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition: DSM-5 published in 2013, hoarding is now listed among other psychiatric diagnoses.

In the article “Why Do You Hoard?” by Bonnie Tsui states that most scientists believe hoarding has three defining characteristics:

  • the excessive acquisition of things that appear to be of little or no value
  • the inability to discard possessions; and
  • the disorganization of those possessions, which clutter up living spaces and make them impossible to use for their intended purposes.” ²

Hoarders

Hoarders often live alone and other people are frequently unaware of their hoarding. Other times hoarders are just considered “pack rats” by those who know them.

Hoarders may save newspapers, papers, plastic bags, pill bottles, shoes, food, mail, photographs, magazines, household supplies, flyers, bottle caps, beer bottles, clothing, or more. Some people even hoard animals.

Jill, a recovering hoarder whose last name was withheld, says about her hoarding:

“I just have too much stuff. I’m a “packrat.” There is stuff everywhere in plastic containers and in drawers. I have enough clothing to dress all the neighbor women for a couple of weeks each. This stuff is mine and I see a use for all of it. I just can’t bring myself to throw away any of it. I like it all! I really wish every space in my house wasn’t a collect-all.

We don’t even get to sit at the table as a family. My husband complains we hate to have unexpected family, we eat out because there is no space on the counter to cook, important papers get lost and we buy more stuff because so many things get misplaced. Everyone passes the blame on someone else. To top it all off, we live in a small ranch home with little closets. How will I ever overcome all of this hoard? I want to live like the normal tidy person—Stuff is ruining MY LIFE.” ³

Types of Hoarding

Many types of hoarding occur because of one’s background, education level, different personality, DNA, and other factors.

The “Address Our Mess” website discusses five main types of hoarding. ⁴

Shopper or Shopping Hoarder

This individual might shop daily. Many of the items purchased find themselves years later in the hallway or closet with the original price tags still on – unused. They might purchase clothing, collectibles, technology. They may feel incapable and experience severe anxiety if they pass up this “basement bargain.”

Food Hoarding

Some shoppers make runs to the grocery stores even when their refrigerators, freezers, and pantries are at full capacity. Throwing away outdated food seems wasteful and rarely occurs. Dealing with spoiled food, diseases, and unsanitary conditions may lead to severe illnesses and possibly death.

Garbage and Trash Hoarding

This type of hoarder is unable to discard their waste and trash. Some hoarders are known to go through other people’s garbage to see if they find valuable items. One might find trash hoarders storing garbage in their homes, garages, yards, or storage facilities.

Animal Hoarding

Many animal hoarders believe that they are helping animals by keeping them safe and loved in their living quarters or on their land. However, they fail to take into account that the lack of grooming, accumulation of waste, and non-existent exercise creates an unsatisfactory environment. Due to deplorable situations, animals are being starved and/or disease-ridden.

Paper Hoarding

Paper hoarders cannot throw away, shed, or discard anything on paper, i.e. bills, flyers, magazines, newspapers, forms, books. Stories abound of people who have been missing and later found injured or dead from being hidden under an extraordinary amount of paper products.

An excellent article written by the National Study Group on Compulsive Disorganization was reprinted in the Dec. 1, 2010, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette newspaper issue. The article was titled, “Levels of Hoarding: Some Guidelines for Recognizing the Problem.” The organization created a scale for professional organizers making their initial contact with their clients. Although the study took place in the early 1990s, it is still relevant and informative today. Click here to read the article:

http://www.post-gazette.com/local/north/2010/12/02/Levels-of-hoarding-some-guidelines-for-recognizing-the-problem/stories/201012020349

Causes of Hoarding

Genetics, anxiety disorders, lack of organization skills, loss, being raised in poverty, fear, psychotic tendencies, and even dementia are reasons why someone might hoard.

For many hoarders, it is incomprehensible to pass by a bargain. They love to shop or purchase items online which they don’t need. They feel they might need the item one day in the future. Hoarders pile things up around their home, office, or yard in an unorganized fashion. Afterwards, they become emotionally attached to these things to the point of being unable to part with them. A vicious cycle occurs with purchasing and saving items. Year after year, the hoarding becomes more harmful and unhealthy.

However, hoarders rarely realize the extent of their hoarding. While it may be obvious to an outsider, the hoarder’s mind may not see the devastation and destruction occurring due to their accumulating and stockpiling.

Carol Mathews of the University of California, San Francisco, and others have studied the cognitive patterns of hoarders. Mathews’ MRI studies try to simulate emotions relating to hoarding, i.e. how a hoarder sorts, categorizes and thinks about discarding items. ⁴

Signs and Symptoms of Hoarding

Hoarders may not recognize how much of a burden their possessions create on their physical, social, emotional, psychological, and spiritual life. Many signs and symptoms indicate potential or established hoarders struggle to pay bills because they keep repurchasing items or devices they have “misplaced.” A few hoarders even lose custody of their children when their environment creates a needless safety or health hazards for their family.

Other indications of a hoarder may include having . . .

  • Limited or no livable space in their home.
  • An isolated and depressed life.
  • A regulated or non-existent social life.
  • Things replace human relationships.
  • Marital problems. (Many divorces occur due to the spouse’s inability to deal with the appalling living conditions.)
  • Children who will not invite their friends over to their home.
  • Financial problems.
  • An inability to organize their possessions.
  • An unfounded fear of running out of items, i.e. shampoo, boxes, food.
  • An inability to sell, give away, or part with their possessions. (This often creates an intolerable anxiety in hoarders.)
  • No power to keep their home functioning due to their clutter, i.e. not being able to reach a light fixture to replace a light bulb.
  • To live with broken household items in their home for fear of inviting repairmen into their extremely cluttered home.
  • An inability to bathe or reach their toilet.
  • An inability to cook due to broken equipment or being able to reach their stove, oven, or microwave.

Hoarding vs. Collecting

Hoarding and collecting are different entities. Both are characterized by acquiring possessions, but their purposes and intentions are different. Having a collection involves a sense of pride about what a person amasses in their acquisitions. Collectors usually display their items in an orderly fashion—on a shelf, in a curio cabinet, over the fireplace. A collector loves to talk to others about their collections.

On the other hand, a hoarder may be embarrassed by their “prized” possessions and they may be uncomfortable with others seeing their accumulation of “stuff.”

Recovery for Hoarders

Ample reasons abound regarding why hoarding should be addressed and why hoarders should be treated. However, the most important reason is that all the accumulation affects the health and safety of the individual and those around them. Hoarding can lead to hospitalizations, children being taken away from parents, fire, evictions, homelessness, and even death.

Help is available for hoarders. A clutter specialist, accountability partner, a 12-step program, and/or a physician is often needed to help with the remediation of this disorder. Understanding that recovery is a continual process is imperative. If someone came into a hoarder’s home and cleared out everything so the home was relatively clean and orderly, the home would quickly become ‘unlivable’ to the average person unless the emotional aspects of hoarding had been dealt with. To overcome a hoarding lifestyle, group involvement must occur. A hoarder needs to find a friend, family member, or support group to help with the initial stages of cleanup.

Many great articles are available on the Internet where support groups and help can be found. Talking to one’s family physician about the problem is an excellent starting point.

Christian Perspective on Hoarding

Just like any other difficulty we face in life, we need hope to overcome it. Making wise choices give us hope while addressing the problem and reaching an actual solution. Hoarding is difficult to treat. God is willing and waiting to help. Nevertheless, there must be a desire in the individual to want to do something about their hoarding problem. God and others will help hoarders free their attitudes regarding possessions and He will help in maintaining a clutter-free lifestyle. This is accomplished through God, therapy, friends, and PRAYER!

GotQuestions.org speaks to hope on its website. “No matter where a hoarder falls of the spectrum, there is hope. A hoarder needs to learn how to make healthy decisions that will lead to resisting the urge for more buying/acquiring, disposing of unneeded items, and putting things in a regular place . . . The underlying cause of hoarding is our human tendency to want things and our inability to discern what is truly valuable. For those with severe compulsive hoarding, anxiety or loss or genetics may prompt the behavior and limit a person’s ability to discern value and worth. But for all of us, Jesus is the most precious treasure we can possess, and His followers should value what He values. Trusting in Him means we no longer should rely on ourselves in a hopeless effort to meet our needs or satisfy our souls. Jesus declared, ‘I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.” (John 6:35)” ⁶

Conclusion:

Informational blogs like this one sometimes lack the compassion which should accompany them. My desire for believers is to have compassion for those unable to free themselves from anything they find themselves in bondage to—including hoarding. When held in bondage, we are unable to be a useful witness for the Lord to others. But, when we are released from that bondage, we open ourselves up to living a full and meaningful life. Let’s be compassionate and caring. At times in our lives, we might find ourselves in difficult situations. We don’t need judgment during those times. We need love, compassion, and help.

If you like this article, let me know, because the flip side to hoarding is when people possess an extreme and excessive need to PURGE themselves of their possessions. It’s a tough concept to comprehend, but it will make for an interesting blog topic someday! And just remember, we are all on the spectrum between the two extremes!

Where do you find yourself?

——–

Bible Verses:

Thought: We live in a word filled with idolatry. Our cars, our homes, our stock portfolios, and our vacations have become idols to us. It’s not rocket science to see how a person can become a hoarder. But believers should be set apart from idolatry no matter what form it takes. The Bible tells us not to love our money or possessions but to serve the Lord with our entire heart. The verses below will help us to see God’s perspective on storing possessions, greed, compassion, and how to overcome any problem we might be facing.

You shall have no other gods before Me. (Exodus 20:3)

There is a grievous evil which I have seen under the sun: riches being hoarded by their owner to his hurt. (Ecclesiastes 5:13

Why do you say, O Jacob, and assert, O Israel, “My way is hidden from the Lord, and the justice due me escapes the notice of my God.” (Isaiah 40:27)

Ah Lord God, Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and by Your outstretched arm! Nothing is too difficult for You. (Jeremiah 32:17)

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; 21 for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:19-21)

No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth. (Matthew 6:24)

Then He said to them, “Beware, and be on your guard against every form of greed; for not even when one has an abundance does his life consist of his possessions.” (Luke 12:15)

Sell your possessions and give to charity; make yourselves money belts which do not wear out, an unfailing treasure in heaven, where no thief comes near nor moth destroys. 34 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Luke 12:33-34)

You, in Your great compassion,
Did not forsake them in the wilderness;
The pillar of cloud did not leave them by day,
To guide them on their way,
Nor the pillar of fire by night, to light for them the way in which they were to go. (Nehemiah 9:19)

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Honor all people, love the brotherhood, fear God, honor the king. (1 Peter 2:17)

Prayer:

My heavenly Father. Thank you for teaching me daily more about Your people. Help me in the areas I struggle with and give me compassion for those who are different from me. Give me Your wisdom and grace. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

GreenePastures.org

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member


Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.


Books by Patti Greene

To order, please click the links below.

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer by Patti Greene
Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer by Patti Greene
Anchor Me
Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer
Awaken Me
Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer

Works Cited

¹ Israel, David. “7 Famous Hoarders.” Mental Floss, 22 Oct 2009. http://mentalfloss.com.

Accessed 11 Aug 2017.

² Tsui, Bonnie. “Why Do You Hoard?” Pacific Standard, 29 Apr 2013. https://psmag.com.

Accessed 10 Aug 2017.

³ “How to Recover from Hoarding—Getting Organized.” Living on a Dime. Livingonadime.com.

Accessed 10 Aug 2017.

⁴ Types of Hoarders. Address Our Mess. https://www.clutterhoardingcleanup.com/types-of-hoarding/

Accessed 17 Oct 2017.

Got Questions. “What Does the Bible Say about Compulsive Hoarding?” Accessed 10 Aug 2017.

⁶ “Types of Hoarding.” Address Our Mess. Clutterhoardingcleanup.com, 18 Sept 2013. Accessed

August 9, 2017.

Do Actions Speak Louder Than Words?

Do Actions Speak Louder Than Words?

by Patti Greene, Greene Pastures by Patti

[From Email notifications, click the title for best web viewing]

Have you ever tried to share your Christian beliefs with someone, and feel you couldn’t get through to them—no matter what you say? They adamantly refuse to hear anything about God or religion. Their callousness might be foreign to you, and even scare you to the point of being fearful of ever talking to them again.

It happens all the time. We may be genuinely interested in a person’s spiritual well-being, and it breaks our heart when we are ignored, criticized, or made fun of for our beliefs just because we try to talk to them about God.

Many reasons abound as to why some people do not have an interest in hearing about God. Maybe it is because they don’t see us living out the Christian life. Maybe it is because they have encountered negative experiences within the church or with Christians. Or, maybe, it is because they have made a conscious decision to avoid all conversations about God or the Bible.

Many times, our mere words cannot express our feelings, thoughts, and beliefs as well as our actions can. If you find your talking gets you nowhere, God may be leading you to switch over to using actions instead of words to show your love to others.

God Uses Our Actions

God used Ezekiel in a “different way” to fulfill his calling in the beginning of his ministry.

In the first half of the Old Testament Book of Ezekiel, we see Ezekiel using actions solely (instead of words) to convey God’s message to the people. The Israelite exiles in Babylon became so desensitized and hard-hearted they would not listen to the word of God being proclaimed by the true prophets. So God commanded Ezekiel to take a different approach—an action approach.

God was so serious about using Ezekiel’s actions to communicate His words that He shut Ezekiel’s mouth for a period of seven years, allowing Ezekiel to speak only when and what he was commanded.

Instead of talking, Ezekiel was called to use what author Warren Wiersbe calls “action sermons”. The people had been warned verbally about their sinful behavior over and over to no avail. But now it was time for actions to take over. Many times, our actions can be what causes people to listen to us.

In Ezekiel 4, God commanded Ezekiel to: write on brick, put up an iron wall, prepare food, and to lay on both his left and right side to show what He wanted to get across to the exiles who had become isolated and distant from God.

Ezekiel sketched a map of Jerusalem on a brick and began playing soldier with the brick to show the House of Israel that the city of Jerusalem would be seized by the Babylonian army. He was then commanded by God to lie on the ground on his left side facing his brick for 390 days and then 40 days on his right side. Many commentaries use these mathematical calculations to show the years of Israel’s past sins and the years that Israel spent in the wilderness with Moses.

This kind of symbolism continues as Ezekiel continues acting out the horror and devastation of what was to come to Jerusalem. Later, the Lord asked Ezekiel to mix 3 different grains and 2 vegetables together to make bread. Scarcity of food was upcoming and Ezekiel was called to caution the people what was to come upon Jerusalem. The people had been warned of their heresy and separation from God with words before, but now God has chosen Ezekiel to use symbols and actions to show His disgust with their disobedience.

Now you son of man, get yourself a brick, place it before you and inscribe a city on it, Jerusalem. Then lay siege against it, build a siege wall, raise up a ramp, pitch camps and place battering rams against it all around. Then get yourself an iron plate and set it up as an iron wall between you and the city, and set your face toward it so that it is under siege, and besiege it. This is a sign to the house of Israel. “As for you, lie down on your left side and lay the iniquity of the house of Israel on it; you shall bear their iniquity for the number of days that you lie on it. For I have assigned you a number of days corresponding to the years of their iniquity, three hundred and ninety days; thus you shall bear the iniquity of the house of Israel. When you have completed these, you shall lie down a second time, but on your right side and bear the iniquity of the house of Judah; I have assigned it to you for forty days, a day for each year. Then you shall set your face toward the siege of Jerusalem with your arm bared and prophesy against it. Now behold, I will put ropes on you so that you cannot turn from one side to the other until you have completed the days of your siege. “But as for you, take wheat, barley, beans, lentils, millet and spelt, put them in one vessel and make them into bread for yourself; you shall eat it according to the number of the days that you lie on your side, three hundred and ninety days (Ezekiel 4:1-9).

Have you ever thought maybe we have talked too much—sometimes until we are blue in our collective face—trying to get God’s message into the hearts of our friends, family or acquaintances?

Maybe it is time to try “action sermons!”

Through our actions sermons, people may see something different in us that will lead to a discussion on our faith. We may even be privileged to share in the joy of their salvation.

While God uses our actions, He is also quite capable and willing to use our speech and words to convey His intended will and plans.

God Uses Our Words

But, God also uses words. Later on in the Book of Ezekiel, God opened Ezekiel’s mouth so he could be a verbal witness in declaring the future prophecies of Jerusalem.

While God may not call us to do weird and strange “action” things like he called Ezekiel to do when he prophesized the unfortunate events awaiting Jerusalem, He may call us to show God’s love to others through a kind word, a meal, a note, or a smile. So I am not saying we should never use words to minister.

Writer Will Maule says it best in his recent article titled “22 Things Christians Need to Stop Doing…Now!”

He states, “It’s just as important to represent Jesus by how we live, but someone can’t respond to the Good News without hearing it . . . and they can’t hear it if no one opens their mouths (Matt 10:27, Romans 10:14-15).” ¹

In my life, I have come to believe that unless what we say agrees with what we do, what we say is meaningless to most people.

God Uses Our Actions and Words

In an ongoing survey, people were asked if people were known by their actions or their words. The result was that 57% believe people are known by their actions and 43% believe that actions do not speak louder than words. ²

This discrepancy leans more to the belief that actions speak louder than words. The Bible is full of verses that discuss the importance of our actions. For example:

But these verses do not overpower the fact that God also uses our speech to minister, guide, encourage, and love others. Without the powerful words of Old Testament prophets, the people would not know God’s laws and His plans. Without the convicting words from the New Testament apostles, people would not know the plan of salvation and sanctification.

Be Obedient

Be open this week to His will in all you DO and SAY. Don’t be afraid to step out and do something “different” if you feel God impressing you to do so. If your motives are right, and it ends up not what God had in mind, He will fix it and make it right. Sometimes we need to step out of our comfort zone to grow, mature, and be obedient, whether in our words or actions. Being obedient to whatever God impresses upon us to do is the key. Both words and actions are important!

God Bless,

PATTIGREENE.eps-(1

Patti Greene, Member Inspirational Writers Alive

Bible Verses:

Therefore, prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 1 Peter 1:3

Jesus answered them, “I told you, and you do not believe; the works that I do in My Father’s name, these testify of Me. John 10:25

Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24

Prayer:

Dear Lord, thank you for the opportunities You give me to share my life with others. Give me wisdom and understanding regarding the best way to approach people with Your truths. You are a God I can trust to lead me in the paths of righteousness. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.


¹ Maule, Will. “22 Things Christians Need to Stop Doing…Now!” Hello Christian. http://hellochristian.com. Accessed 17 Feb 2017.

² “Do actions speak louder than words?” The Premier Online Debate Website. Debate.org. N.p., 21 Feb. 2017. Web. 21 Feb. 2017 <http://www.debate.org/>.

Edited by E. Johnson; Image Permission from J. Morisho 2-18-2017. Bible Verses from NASB.


If you liked this article and would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe. It is an easy way not to miss any posts in your feed! Moreover, I would love seeing you as part of the Greene Pastures Community.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

A 90-day devotional prayer journal for all ages; This informative and how-to book on prayer is for seekers, new believers, and mature believers. It encourages a commitment and devotion to the art of prayer. Learn how God reveals himself through Bible study and prayer. ISBN: 978-1512760453 (Paperback) $11.95 on Amazon.

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

A 365-day devotional prayer journal for in-depth Bible study; Fun words or phrases from the Old and New Testaments! Perfect for mature believers. ISBN: 978-1490893181 (Paperback) $27.95 on Amazon.

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

A 181-day devotional prayer journal for growing individuals; The Bible and social issues. Perfect for new believers. Comes with a group study guide. ISBN: 978-1490893174 (Paperback) $19.95 on Amazon.

Blogger Badge - White background 100x100#bgbg2

 

The Linchpin of Loyalty: With God or the Super Bowl, Hanging Together Wins the Game

The Linchpin of Loyalty: With God or the Super Bowl, Hanging Together Wins the Game

Continue reading The Linchpin of Loyalty: With God or the Super Bowl, Hanging Together Wins the Game

Christian Gifts

Christian Gifts

By Patti Greene / Greene Pastures by Patti

Originally Posted 12/06/2016

[From Email notifications, click the title for best web viewing]

Christmas is around the corner! And, have you finished your shopping? I decided to ask some friends and family about where they have found some interesting, unique, and even routine Christian gifts. Below you will find the results. I’m hoping that this list will help you in your last-minute Christmas shopping and even into the new year. Links come and go, so if they are here today and gone tomorrow, that is technology on the move. Even though Greene Pastures is not recommending every item you may find on this list, many items will bring long-lasting joy to those you know.

So, grab some coffee and surf through these sites. Get some ideas for gifts even if you don’t buy from those sites per se. In addition, keep your eyes open for those items you love. There are always those folks who do ask you for what you want and now you can be ready for your response.

Wrapping up my shopping now will be easy. But, I better get moving. Online purchasing is easy! But order quickly as mail takes time and we don’t want gifts arriving after Jesus’ birthday or any birthday.

Christian Gifts

CLICK LINKS BELOW TO SEE CHRISTIAN GIFT ITEMS! HAVE FUN SHOPPING!

Best Selling Religious Gifts from Personalization Mall

Bible Scripture Bags and Handbags

Bible Trivia Games [Adults and Children] from Kohl’s

Bible Verse Posters by All Posters.com

Bibles from Mardel

Bible Toys Noah’s Ark 18 Piece Playset with Noah, 14 Animals and Floating Ark – Christian Based Faith Children Toys

Boxed Christian Cards from Daysprings

Christian Coloring Books for Adults and Children

Christian Cross Adult Bib

Christian Home Décor

Christian Jewelry that Inspires Faith in Jesus Christ

Christian Mugs

Christian Prayer Cube Bedtime Prayers

Christian Toys, Puzzles, and Games [By Age]

Christian T-Shirts from Christian Apparel Shop

Christian Videos for Children from Mardel

Christmas Specials and Giveaways by Elle Bee

Cute Clothes for Infants and Toddlers

Dear Mushka Products

Devotional Prayer Journals by Patti Greene

Gift Shop at Dayspring

I Can Read Book Series

Journals and Notebooks from Daysprings

Lauren Nicole Handwritten Gifts [Put a signature on Jewelry]

Miscellaneous Christian Gifts from Zazzle

Mother, Woman Of God Pen and Bookmark Gift Set

Practical Gifts for Him from Christian Books

Religious Christmas Gifts from Bradford Exchange

Roses and Teacups Gifts and Favors

The Jerusalem Gift Shop – Variety of Gifts

Unique Christian Gifts on Zazzle

Willow Tree Collection by Demdaco

And a good friend said, “Be sure to check out your local artists!”

God Bless. And let me know what treasures you find!

PATTIGREENE.eps-(1

Patti Greene, Member Inspirational Writers Alive


Bible Verses:

  • Am I not allowed to do what I choose what belongs to me? Or do you begrudge my generosity? Matthew 20:15
  • Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32
  • Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. Proverbs 3:3

Prayer:

Lord, as I choose gifts this season, please guide me in choosing items that will be honorable in your eyes. Let me discern when I should purchase Christian gifts for others. Let me find the perfect gift that will help them be a servant for you. Thank you, Jesus, for all you do for me and let me pass on Christian generosity to others. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.


If you liked this article and would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe. It is an easy way not to miss any posts in your feed! Moreover, I would love seeing you as part of the Greene Pastures Community.

My Books – Available on Amazon or can be ordered at any retail bookstore. You may order an autographed copy by clicking on ‘Shop-Books by Patti Greene’ on this site.

NEW RELEASE – Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer

Just in time for Christmas! Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer has just been released by WestBow Press. I am so excited about this new book. If you or anyone you know is interested in developing a life of prayer, this 90-day prayer journal is perfect.

Answer Me includes:

  • An Undated Dateline
  • Topic of Prayer
  • Scripture Verse
  • Suggested Reading
  • Daily Thought
  • Prayer Request Section
  • Personal Reflection Section
  • Prayer

To Order from Amazon:

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

A 90-day devotional prayer journal for all ages; This informative and how-to book on prayer is for seekers, new believers, and mature believers. It encourages a commitment and devotion to the art of prayer. Learn how God reveals himself through Bible study and prayer. ISBN: 978-1512760453 (Paperback) $11.95 on Amazon.

Other Books by Patti Greene:

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

A 365-day devotional prayer journal for in-depth Bible study; Fun words or phrases from the Old and New Testaments! Perfect for mature believers. ISBN: 978-1490893181 (Paperback) $27.95 on Amazon.

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

A 181-day devotional prayer journal for growing individuals; The Bible and social issues. Perfect for new believers. Comes with a group study guide. ISBN: 978-1490893174 (Paperback) $19.95 on Amazon.

Comments are always welcome. And, I would love to see you subscribe to my blog. To sign up for Newsletter and/or blog, click here.

On my blog, I want to write about topics that serve your needs and about what matters to you. I strive to help you with your needs and interests. Therefore, I am inviting you to share your interests with me so the content I write about will be more relevant to you. Please comment on this blog or email me at Patti@GreenePastures.org for confidentiality.

Blogger Badge - White background 100x100#bgbg2

Emotional Stress

Emotional Stress

[From Email notifications, click the title for best web viewing]

Emotional Stress – Let’s face it. Everybody experiences stress from time to time. Life brings both the good and the bad. However, some individuals experience the “ups and downs” that come with living life more than others do. In Recognizing an Emotional Breakdown, author Tara Warta says, “When pressure begins to overwhelm an individual to the point where her [his] professional or personal well-being is compromised, symptoms of a nervous breakdown may become apparent. Such an event can take place for a variety of reasons, and common culprits include a traumatic family event, [an] unreasonable amount of stress in the workplace or a dramatic change in a relationship.” ¹

When we are deeply overwhelmed or troubled, our emotions, our decision-making ability, and our relationships are unable to continue in the normal fashion. Emotional stress usually causes physical symptoms like tremors, heart palpitations, intense headaches, breakouts, physical pain in the chest, and more.

Emotional breakdowns occur when the stress becomes so unbearable that we do not know how to handle it. We have reached our limit. Different individuals experience diverse symptoms. Stressors may cause emotional instability, changes in health, and a disrupted spiritual balance. When we have reached our capacity to function, we may be on the verge of an emotional breakdown.

Merriam Webster’s Thesaurus uses the following words to explain how someone who is stressed-out feels.²

Burned-out [Burnt out]; Exhausted; Knackered [British]; Tired; Worn-out; Undone; Unmanned; Unnerved, Unstrung; Troubled; Upset; Edgy; Nervous; Tense; Uneasy; Agitated; Disturbed; Perturbed, Aggravated; Angry; Annoyed; Exasperated; Irritated; and Shell-shocked.

I performed an Internet search to find out what types of situations lead people to emotional stress. Listed below are some catalysts one might find leading to extreme stress or possibly a complete nervous breakdown.

  1. You are pregnant and you don’t want to be;
  2. You fear you might have dementia;
  3. You are extremely troubled by your family’s choices;
  4. You hate your job or you cannot find a job;
  5. You are deeply depressed over your boyfriend or girlfriend breaking up with you;
  6. You are extremely concerned about your church;
  7. You fear you might not go to heaven;
  8. You are stressed beyond measure being a caregiver;
  9. You made a huge mistake at work;
  10. You are fearful of being sued, fired, or foreclosed on;
  11. You are experiencing a messy divorce;
  12. You can’t handle or care for your children;
  13. Moreover, the list goes on.

Thankfully, removing a few stressors allow some individuals to rebound from the emotional stress they are dealing with. Unfortunately, others may not be able to snap back even when their load lightens. In the case of a sinking state-of-mind, medical intervention is often necessary. Timely medical help may even necessitate an urgent visit to the doctor or emergency room. Never ignore your emotional well-being. It could be the difference between life and death.

Being a believer does not shield us from all the rises and falls we encounter in life. Life happens. Our source is always God, our Father. He provides His Word, His people, and his Holy Spirit to help us. When times are hard or troubles engulf us, allow Him to be our guide. We may have trouble praying ourselves in these emotional times, but God always provides. Many times, He works through other people or professionals. If you need to talk or receive counseling, choose someone you trust, and share your difficulties with him or her.

When Jesus came face to face with the most difficult time of His life, He wanted His friends nearby. Even Jesus did not try to face his most difficult moment alone and neither should we.

In Matthew 26:36-39,

Jesus came with them to a place called Gethsemane, and said to His disciples, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.” And He took with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee [James and John], and began to be grieved and distressed. Then He said to them, “My soul is deeply grieved, to the point of death; remain here and keep watch with me.” And He went a little beyond them, and fell on His face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will.”

HOW TO HELP SOMEONE EXPERIENCING AN “EMOTIONALLY STRESSFUL” SITUATION

  1. Listen

  • Listening does not mean giving them advice. The advice might stress them more and lead them deeper into more turmoil.
  • “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” James 1:19 ESV
  1. Reduce the load and stressors if possible

  • Find people who are willing and able to take the load and pressure off them.
  • “In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” Acts 20:35 ESV
  1. Give reassurance that God cares

  • Be an encourager and let them know they are not alone in their present situation.
  • “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11 ESV
  1. Give confidence that feeling better is within reach

  • Provide hope there are better days ahead.
  • “For I know the plans I have for you, declares theLord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11 ESV
  1. Intervene, if needed, with family, medical, and/or spiritual help

  • Use discernment when deciding whom can best help in the situation. In addition, be prepared to act when an emergency arises.
  • “Then Phinehas stood up and intervened, and the plague was stayed.” Psalm 106:30 ESV
  1. Be a confidant

  • Do not gossip about his/her condition or situation with others unless the person has given you permission. Even then, be discerning.
  • “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.” Proverbs 16:28 ESV

Bible Verses:

See above.

Prayer:

Oh LORD, as I reach for You, untangle my nerves and give me hope. Make things better. I am distraught; the pressures are too much. My lists grow longer every day. I cannot meet deadlines. I am about to break. Please help me Lord Jesus. In Your precious name, I pray. Amen.

¹ http://www.lifescript.com/well-being/articles/r/recognizing_an_emotional_breakdown.aspx?p=1

² http://www.merriam-webster.com/thesaurus/stressed


If you liked this article and would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe. It is an easy way not to miss any posts in your feed! Moreover, I would love seeing you as part of the Greene Pastures Community.

Web Page: www.PattiGreene.com

To order Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here.

To order Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here.


Comments are always welcome. And, I would love to see you subscribe to my blog. To sign up for Newsletter and/or blog, click here.

Greene Pastures Social Media
Greene Pastures Social Media

On my blog, I want to write about topics that serve your needs and about what matters to you. I strive to help you with your needs and interests. Therefore, I am inviting you to share your interests with me so the content I write about will be more relevant to you. Please comment in this blog or email me at pattilondagreene@gmail.com for confidentiality.

Blogger Badge - White background 100x100#bgbg2