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It’s the Inconveniences that Get to Me!

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What Is An Inconvenience?

All human beings experience inconveniences every now and then. The word “inconvenience” and its derivatives come under different terms such as disruption, aggravation, hassle, trouble, stress, difficulty, and more.

This past week (Thursday, to be exact), I had my day scheduled—Bible study, writing my blog, cleaning closets, working in the yard, but in the afternoon, my mother became very ill: the kind of “ill” that required a trip to the Emergency Room.

After evaluation, my mother was admitted to the hospital. Being the only daughter, I am the designated sibling to stay at the hospital with my mother each evening—not that I minded in the least. During the four-day hospital stay, my schedule was disrupted and I didn’t accomplish anything on my “to-do” list.

This is NOT the kind of inconvenience I am talking about.

The kind of inconvenience I am talking about is the annoying inconveniences that cause one’s stress level to heighten, one’s blood pressure to elevate, and one’s heart rate to become erratic. These usually happen because our mind is set on what we want to do, but then something gets in our way and produces a different schedule other than our anticipated one.

To Illustrate

On Tuesday, I went to the drug store. I arrived home only to realize that I forgot to pick up a medicine I really needed. I sighed and berated myself because I had to drive back to the store during Houston’s horrendous rush hour traffic. It was inconvenient!

On Wednesday, my computer wasn’t cooperating. My husband wasn’t home to fix it. I moaned and groaned. Why? Because I wanted to do what I wanted to do right then and there without having to wait—because waiting is inconvenient!

It sounds foolish that I stress out over trivial and insignificant things. I am a Christ-follower who is supposed to be patient, kind, and self-controlled, but just a small inconvenience can upset my spiritual life, my thought processes, and my physical health dramatically.

I know God sees my inconsequential aggravations and stress. I wonder, though, what He thinks about my petty annoyances while He is handling big problems like wars, death, floods, earthquakes, false prophets, shootings, child abuse, drug abuse, and evil.

What does God think about my triviality?

“Surely what a man does when he is taken off his guard is the best evidence for what sort of man he is.” C.S. Lewis-www.GreenePastures.org
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Biblical Characters Who Were Inconvenienced

The Bible is full of people who were inconvenienced. Some are only inconvenienced for a short period of time—others for years.

  • Saul was inconvenienced when he was charged to look for his father’s lost donkeys. When Saul decided to return to his father without locating his donkeys, Saul’s servant suggested they look for “a seer” in a different town to inquire about the journey they had set out upon. In those days, seers were also known as prophets. Saul had been inconvenienced again by having to go to a different city than he had planned. However, while there, God arranged for the prophet Samuel and Saul to meet and Saul was anointed to be the King of Israel. Here we see that disruptions and inconveniences of are often part of the Lord’s plans for our life. (1 Samuel 9-10)
  • Jesus was inconvenienced when the people kept following him wanting His attention, but He welcomed and ministered to them in love. (Luke 23:27-29)
  • The disciples were tired and wanted to rest, but Jesus inconvenienced them by asking them to feed the 5,000. (Matthew 14:15-21)
  • Paul was inconvenienced by being arrested and put in prison time after time when all he wanted to do was spread the gospel. (Acts 21:31-37)

In each of these situations, the Bible reveals that great things occurred out of inconveniences. A king was crowned. Ministry took place. People were miraculously fed. And the gospel was spread through Paul’s writings in prison.

Have you ever thought about how we should respond when we experience difficulties?

How to Respond to Inconveniences, Disruptions, Aggravations, Hassles, Inopportunity, Troubles, and Difficulties

  • Recognize that the inconveniences we encounter are there to grow us closer to the Lord and to prepare us for what else might come in our future.
  • Pray immediately by giving the situation to the Lord and seek His purpose for it.
  • Understand and meditate on the Word of God with thanksgiving.
  • Look at inconveniences as divine opportunities.
  • Control anger.

A Look-Back

Referring to my earlier illustrations . . .

When I returned to the drug store, I found a lonely soul who needed my smile.

When my computer didn’t work, I was able to find something more constructive to do.

If only I wouldn’t have allowed those inconveniences to get the best of me before I saw the benefits.

Well, maybe next time I will!

Bible Verses:

“In everything give thanks, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

“For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

“Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians  12:10)

Prayer:

Dear Lord,

Please let me look at my inconveniences and disruptions through Your eyes. Let me understand that everything I experience is meant to draw me closer to the destiny You have for me. Thank you for the plans You have for me. Grant me the ability to accept what comes into my life. Let me follow where You lead and let me become closer and closer to You.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

God Bless,

GreenePastures.org

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member #bgbg2

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

To order, please click the links below.

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer by Patti Greene
Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer by Patti Greene
Anchor Me
Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer
Awaken Me
Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer

Bibliography

“The 100 Best C.S. Lewis Quotes.” Anchored in Christ, 30 April 2014, http://www.kevinhalloran.net/best-c-s-lewis-quotes. Accessed 22 Oct 2017.

#bgbg2, Bible Study, God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit, People in the Bible, Sin, The Bible

Ezekiel: When God Says, “Enough is Enough!”

Ezekiel was called to do a job that required him to speak only when God told him to speak. God had conveyed that He was finished with their disobedience and hard hearts. Enough was enough, and He was ready to judge and punish His people for their rebellious spirit and actions.

Ezekiel, The Son of Man

In many respects, I relate to Ezekiel, an Old Testament priest, and prophet. Every time I write, I want to write only what God wants me to share with you. I try to write when He speaks to me, just as Ezekiel did when he spoke.

When Ezekiel spoke, he was to proclaim God’s message which was disregarded by the people and caused his peers to laugh and disrespect him. Ezekiel’s task was to foretell the future of Jerusalem and Judah to the people. He was to prophesy about the siege of Jerusalem, the desolation of Jerusalem, the idolatrous worship, the punishment for their wicked behavior, and their blasphemous disrespect for the temple.

In Chapters 4-7, where these issues were the major topics of interest, Ezekiel is called the “son of man” at the beginning of each chapter. In fact, Ezekiel is the only prophet regularly called the “son of man” by God. Some say that Ezekiel was called the “son of man” to show his humanness and to differentiate himself from the supernatural and bizarre visions he had—some of which occur in these chapters.

As we travel this journey together with Ezekiel, let’s remember that he is like us and human in many respects. He was brought up by religious parents and married in his 20s. He differed because he was exiled to Babylonia and he was receptive to God’s call on his life. Ezekiel had been filled with the Holy Spirit to do a BIG job. He is a believer in following God’s call on his life.

For 20 years, God called Ezekiel where people criticized him, made fun of him. He even continued his call through the untimely death of his beloved wife. He was called to proclaim the fall, turmoil, and restoration of Judah and especially Jerusalem.

Ezekiel knew that he was to be obedient. God shared this doom through action sermons. Action sermons consisted of Ezekiel acting out vivid physical depictions of God’s impending judgment in front of the people.

Are we willing to be obedient and endure being made fun of to be obedient to God? Some of us would if we had God’s continual assurance we were operating in His strength for His purposes.

Let’s look closer . . . Let’s see how Ezekiel did it by first looking at some prominent verses in Ezekiel 4-7.

I. An Action Sermon Ezekiel 4:1-3

Now you son of man, get yourself a brick, place it before you and inscribe a city on it, Jerusalem. Then lay siege against it, build a siege wall, raise up a ramp, pitch camps and place battering rams against it all around. Then get yourself an iron plate and set it up as an iron wall between you and the city, and set your face toward it so that it is under siege, and besiege it. This is a sign to the house of Israel.

II. An Action Sermon Ezekiel 5:1-2 

As for you, son of man, take a sharp sword; take and use it as a barbers’ razor on your head and beard. Then take scales for weighing and divide the hair. One-third you shall burn in the fire at the center of the city, when the days of the siege are completed. Then you shall take one-third and strike it with the sword all around the city, and one-third you shall scatter to the wind, and I will unsheathe a sword behind them.

III. An Action Sermon Ezekiel 6:1-3; Ezekiel 6:13

And the word of the Lord came to me saying, “Son of man, set your face toward the mountains of Israel, and prophesy against them and say, ‘Mountains of Israel, listen to the word of the Lord God!’ Thus, says the Lord God to the mountains, the hills, the ravines and the valleys: “Behold, I Myself am going to bring a sword on you, and I will destroy your high places.

Then you will know that I am the Lord, when their slain is among their idols around their altars, on every high hill, on all the tops of the mountains, under every green tree and under every leafy oak—the places where they offered soothing aroma to all their idols.

IV. Prophecy Ezekiel 7:1-4

Moreover, the word of the Lord came to me saying, “And you, son of man, thus says the Lord God to the land of Israel, ‘An end! The end is coming on the four corners of the land. Now the end is upon you, and I will send My anger against you; I will judge you according to your ways and bring all your abominations upon you. For My eye will have no pity on you, nor will I spare you, but I will bring your ways upon you, and your abominations will be among you; then you will know that I am the Lord!’

Let’s Consider the Atmosphere

At the time, there was a spiritual battle going on between God and His people. The people were involved in deliberate and continual rebellion and they were about to reap the consequences. According to The Broadman Bible Commentary, they were worshiping pagan cults. They were morally corrupt. Their leaders were not guiding the people. Their priests gave no wise counsel. Even their court officials led with despair.

God was not going to tolerate their sinful behavior anymore.

At this point, God has called Ezekiel. He told him to prophesy to the people by using signs, action sermons, and visions. He was asked to do strange things to describe the desolation that was going to happen in Jerusalem. God gave him three specific prophecies regarding how the people will be punished—one-third will die by plagues or famine; one-third will fall by the sword; one-third will be scatted to every wind.

Ezekiel was told to denounce idolatry and tell the people of upcoming famines and diseases. He was obedient although up against calloused people who had no interest in hearing the word of God or prophecies of disaster even though he reminded them that God will leave a remnant of His people.

Let’s Consider the People

The people were enjoying their sinful lives. They took pride in their gorgeous jewels. They worshiped their vile idols and enjoyed their wealth to the fullest. The people continued to enrich themselves with material possessions, but their possessions were used for evil.

But, the Bible talks about disaster upon disaster about to be released upon them.

The people could not believe God would punish or hurt them. We hear this today, too, when people say, “God is good, and would never do anything to hurt us.”

It is rather devastating when a Trojan Horse “pop-up” warning appears on your computer screen while you are looking at a website. When it happened to me today, I immediately went to an authoritative source who could fix the problem—my husband.

But, that is not what happens in the book of Ezekiel. The people of Judah were so involved in their own pursuits they ignored the prophecies which instructed them to repent and turn to their own “authoritative source who could fix the problem”—God. They were not prepared to hear God through His servant Ezekiel. Today, Godly ministers experience many people who sit and listen to this same message, but it goes in one ear and out the other.

Let’s Consider the Leaders

The leaders themselves were not accountable to God. But regardless, God was making the people individually responsible for their actions even as their leaders were failing them.

Let’s Consider God

God’s patience was all used up and the penalty for their disobedience was coming NO MATTER WHAT. He was ready to unleash his anger and judge them for their conduct. Basically, God was sick and tired of the people’s shameless sinning. He tells Ezekiel that he is about to cut off the food supply in Jerusalem and only give the people rationed water. He tells Ezekiel the people will waste away because of their sin. In Ezekiel 5:10, we are told that parents will eat their children and children were going to eat their parents. They were to be scattered to the wind. Nations would hate them. The wild beasts will be against them. And plagues and bloodshed were coming. Bones were going to be scattered, towns laid waste, and the high places of idolatry were going to be demolished. God was not going to spare the people or look at them with pity. God was going to withdraw from them. He was not going to have any more pity on them. A crisis was lurking around the corner!

Nevertheless, in His graciousness, God tells why He is going to cripple the people. In Ezekiel 6:14b, God states that His desired result is that, “They will know that I am the LORD.”

In Ezekiel 5:11b, God says, “I myself will shave you. I will not look on you with pity or spare you.” Shaving in the Bible is associated with drastic measures. And drastic measures were coming. Remember ten years ago when pop singer Britney Spears shaved her head amid a personal meltdown? It was during a desperate time in her life. And God’s people were about to become desperate.

What Happens When God Has Had Enough of Our Sins?

  1. He warns us by confronting us with our sin. Sometimes He speaks through our conscience, other times by other people, sometimes through the Word of God. This gives us a chance to confront our sin and change. Sometimes He warns us multiple times over an extended period.
  2. We have a choice whether to turn from our ways, or not. Choosing to disobey is never a good idea.
  3. If we do not turn away from our sins, He warns us judgment is coming. It comes in God’s timing, but it always comes—in this life or in the afterlife.
  4. God decides on the judgment. It is always God’s prerogative in how He will judge you for a defiant and/or stubborn spirit.
  5. God punishes us. It is also God’s choice in how He chooses to punish us.
We have a choice whether to turn from our sins, or not. Choosing to disobey is never a good idea. www.GreenePastures.org
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Pastor Tony Evans has a quotation in one of his books that states, “Sinners have a jar. Once the jar is full, it’s over. Every time a sinner rebels against God, they fill up the jar. When the jar is full, God judges them.” ¹ When God’s jar is full and He says enough is enough, it’s never a good sign. Punishment will come. It may come in the form of suffering, misfortune, heartbreak, disease, or any kind of catastrophe of His choosing.

Ezekiel’s call was to warn the Jews of the upcoming judgment in Jerusalem and Judah. He was obedient; he obeyed God in the task. Many people of the land chose to continue in their sin. No matter what side of the spectrum you are on—following the LORD or rebelling against the LORD, we are all called to be obedient.

In a rebellious state, repentance is the only suitable option. We may be the remnant that will be restored. We are reestablished by looking at the source, Jesus Christ. If we are already living a holy and acceptable life, let’s encourage others to be restored before something ruinous happens to them. In the case of the Jews in Judah, it was, unfortunately, death!

On January 24, 1994, in his State of the State Address, New York Governor Mario M. Cuomo, said, “In baseball, it’s three strikes and you’re out. Here [in the law], it’s three strikes and you’re in for life. ²

Let’s not “strike out” in life. Let’s not get to the point where God says, “Enough is enough!” Let’s look at the source before it is too late because when all is said and done, God’s purpose is that we will know that He is the LORD.” (Ezekiel 6:14b)

Bible Verses:

[Blessings of Obedience] You shall not make for yourselves idols, nor shall you set up for yourselves an image or a sacred pillar, nor shall you place a figured stone in your land to bow down to it; for I am the Lord your God. (Leviticus 26:1)

“What are your multiplied sacrifices to Me?” Says the Lord. “I have had enough of burnt offerings of rams and the fat of fed cattle; And I take no pleasure in the blood of bulls, lambs or goats. (Isaiah 1:11)

Therefore, thus says the Lord God, ‘Because you have forgotten Me and cast Me behind your back, bear now the punishment of your lewdness and your harlotries.’” (Ezekiel 23:35)

Prayer:

Dear heavenly Father. Help me in my life to always desire to follow You. If I am led to a life that is dishonorable to You, please show me my wicked ways. Give me the courage to turn back to You. I need You every day Lord. I need Your protection, guidance, and wisdom to be all You have called me to be. Lord, I ask for Your forgiveness in the ways I have been living. I toss all sins and undesirable associations out of my life to follow You. I’ve had enough of my sin and I desire to live the life You have called me to live. Thank you, Jesus. In Your name, I pray. Amen.

God Bless,

GreenePastures.org

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited

¹ Evans, Tony. Tony Evans’ Book of Illustrations: Stories, Quotes, and Anecdotes from more than 30 years

               of preaching and public speaking. Chicago: Moody, 2009.

² Spinrad, Leonard and Thelma Spinrad. Speaker’s Lifetime Library. Paramus, NJ: Prentice Hall. 1997.

Bibliography

Losch, Richard. All the People in the Bible: An A-Z Guide to the Saints, Scoundrels, and Other Characters in Scripture. Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2008.

Wiersbe, Warren. Be Reverent: Bowing Before Our Awesome God. Colorado Springs: David Cook, 2000.

Allen, Clifton, ed. The Broadman Bible Commentary: Jeremiah-Daniel. Nashville: Broadman, 1971.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer by Patti Greene
Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer by Patti Greene
Anchor Me
Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer
Awaken Me
Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer
#bgbg2, Bible Study, God's Will, People in the Bible

The Life of Ezekiel: His Call and Commission

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Over the years, I have been fascinated by the Old Testament prophet Ezekiel. His colorful character, his crazy antics, his visions, his ability to withstand criticism, his capacity to move on after his wife’s death, and more has created my unparalleled interest in his life. I have always wanted to delve deeper into the man who wailed, ate a scroll, dug a hole in the wall, slapped his thighs, experienced visions, and more—all to get God’s message to the people God called him to reach. So, I did.

I spent a dedicated portion of my Bible study time every Monday through Friday studying the Book of Ezekiel. What I learned is what I want to share with you in this series on Ezekiel.

The main theme of the Book of Ezekiel although not the only one is the restoration of Israel—a nation that had turned to rebellion and sin. Ezekiel was called to warn the people that Jerusalem would be turned to rubble and terror. And it was coming soon.

For the Record: Nebuchadnezzar II

Ezekiel lived during the time of King Nebuchadnezzar II, King of Babylonia. Nebuchadnezzar II is not to be confused with Nebuchadnezzar I, who are unrelated and both go by the name of just Nebuchadnezzar.

Nebuchadnezzar I lived from 1125–1104 BC. He was the fourth king of the Second Dynasty of Isin and Fourth Dynasty of Babylon. He ruled for two decades and was the most important ruler of this dynasty.

Nebuchadnezzar II ruled from approximately 605 BC-652 BC. As a founder of the Neo-Babylonian Empire, Nebuchadnezzar II conquered Judah in 598 BC. He exiled many people including scholars, religious leaders, and government officials to Mesopotamia. “Babylonia was an ancient Akkadian-speaking state and cultural area based in central-southern Mesopotamia.” ¹ It was during the second exile/deportation in 597 BC Ezekiel was uprooted along with 8,000 others to live in Mesopotamia for five years before experiencing the vision that changed his life.

Ezekiel

At the age of 30, after living five years in this exiled land, Ezekiel, a Zadokite priest, experienced the vision in which he received a call and underwent a commission to serve the Lord in a mighty way. Zadokite priests were known to remain faithful to God while other priests were known to go astray and they were to be respected as an authority figure in the community. However, during the time of rebellion, these true priests were mocked and not taken seriously.

After Ezekiel’s vision, the next 20 years of Ezekiel’s ministry involved saying and doing many bizarre things to get the attention of the people. He was to prophesy about the fall of Jerusalem, the judgment on Israel, and its glorious future. At the same time, Nebuchadnezzar II was expanding the Babylonian Empire, Jerusalem remained rather peaceful for a few years and it was during that time Ezekiel warned the Jews of the impending crisis and the upcoming fall of Jerusalem in 586 BC.

The first three chapters in the book of Ezekiel are filled with extraordinary verses about Ezekiel’s preparation, call, and commission. Let’s move on.

Ezekiel 1: A Chapter Summary

1:1b “The heavens were opened and I saw visions of God.”

1:3a “The word of the LORD came expressly to Ezekiel the priest, son of Buzi.”

1:4-5 “And as I looked, beyond a storm wind was coming from the north . . . And within it, there were figures resembling four living beings . . .”

1:15 “Now as I looked at the living beings, beyond, there was one wheel on the earth beside the living beings, for each of the four of them.”

1:20a “Wherever the spirit was about to go, they would go in that direction.”

1:28 “. . . Such was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the LORD. And when I saw it, I fell on my face and heard a voice speaking.”

Ezekiel’s Vision

It is easy to get bogged down in minute details of Ezekiel’s vision. But, let’s look at the overall meaning of what is going on in this vision.

In this vision, Ezekiel saw four bizarre creatures braced on wheels. This would frighten anyone. But God showed Ezekiel that he had a purpose in this vision—Ezekiel was being shown that he was going to see things that other people would not be able to see.

Before starting his ministry, God was showing Ezekiel that God and His spirit was still in control of the world he was living in. The chapter ends with Ezekiel experiencing God’s glory. Ezekiel needed this reassurance before proceeding to receive his call and commission. God was preparing, strengthening, and encouraging him to face the things to come . . . just as He does with us!

How Did God Prepare Ezekiel for His Upcoming Call and Commission?

  • God confirmed the vision was from Him; Ezekiel 1:1
  • God convinced Ezekiel that He knows what He is doing; Ezekiel 1:20
  • God revealed His glory to Ezekiel; Ezekiel 1:28

In our lives, God wants us to be so close to Him that we recognize His presence when we see it. God is in control of everything and when we look for His glorious presence, it will be shown to us.

In our lives, God wants us to be so close to Him that we recognize His presence when we see it. GreenePastures.org
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Moving On . . .

Ezekiel 2: A Chapter Summary

2:1-2 “Then He said to me, ‘Son of man, stand on your feet that I may speak with you! And as He spoke to me the Spirit entered me and set me on my feet and I heard Him speaking to me.

2:7-10 “But you shall speak My words to them whether they listen or not, for they are rebellious . . . Open your mouth and eat what I am giving you. Then I looked, behold, a hand was extended to me; and lo, a scroll was in it. When He spread it out before me, it was written on the front and back; and written on it were lamentations, mourning, and woe.”

Ezekiel: The Prophet’s Call

In a nutshell, God tells Ezekiel to stand, listen, speak, be courageous, and obey the Word of God. Many times, in the Bible, when God says to stand, it is because He has something very significant to tell us.

I was called to write my books while standing up. God impressed upon me to get up off the couch, stand up, and go into my closet. It was there that God impressed me to look up and see the 42 years of prayer journals I had kept. It was then that God’s Spirit revealed it was time to start writing my devotional books because He had already been preparing me.

While Ezekiel was standing, God’s spirit entered him and he heard God speaking to him. God proceeded to tell him who He is sending him to (a rebellious people), how he should respond to these rebellious people (speak and do not be dismayed), and what to do (be obedient and eat the scroll provided.)

How to Know Your Calling

Many Bible believers recognize that to have an effective ministry for God they must be called into ministry. Many stories abound regarding famous people being called by God in the Bible. These include Moses, Daniel, Isaiah, Elijah, Esther, and Jesus’ mother Mary. But, I am not talking here about being called into full-time ministry here. I am talking about regular people being called into service for God.

I know in my life when I feel called to do something, like teach a class or work in a ministry, I am more confident in the abilities God has given me to use in whatever the capacity is. People are called by different methods. Ezekiel was called through a vision. You might be called through a whisper, a mighty voice from God, or a quiet communication from the Holy Spirit.

People might be called through a whisper, a voice, or a quiet communication from God. www.GreenePastures.org
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What Does God Want Us to Know?

God wants our lives to be committed to Him before He can show us His plans.

God does have a plan for our lives.

God can (and most likely will) change or modify our plans so we will go in the direction of His will for us.

God calls all believers to make disciples.

God will provide open doors, but we must actively look for them.

God wants us to ask Him for direction, guidance, and wisdom.

Ezekiel 2 talks about Ezekiel’s Call while Ezekiel 3 speaks about Ezekiel’s commission. Missionary evangelist Daniel Kolenda describes it in the best way I could find using an example from the New Testament. He says,

“When Jesus called His disciples, He didn’t call them to be apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors or teachers. He simply called them to follow Him. And as they followed Him, Jesus promised that He would make them into “fishers of men.” Now the disciples left their nets immediately to follow Jesus, but they were not made into fishers of men immediately. There was a season of training between when Jesus called them to follow Him and when He commissioned them to preach the gospel.” ²

Moving On . . .

Ezekiel 3: A Chapter Summary

3:1 “Then He said to me, ‘Son of man, eat what you find; eat this scroll, and go, speak to the house of Israel.”

3:2 “So I opened my mouth, and He fed me this scroll.

3:4-5, 7a “Then He said to me, ‘Son of man, go to the house of Israel and speak with My words to them. For you are not being sent to a people of unintelligible speech or difficult language, but to the house of Israel … yet the house of Israel will not be willing to listen to you since they are not willing to listen to Me.

3:22-24 “And the hand of the LORD was on me there, and He said to me, ‘Get up, go out to the plain, and there I will speak to you. So, I got up and went out to the plain; and behold, the glory of the LORD was standing there, like the glory which I saw by the river Chebar, and I fell on my face. The Spirit then entered me and made me stand on my feet, and He spoke with me and said to me, ‘Go shut yourself up in your house.

3:26 “Moreover, I will make your tongue stick to the roof of your mouth so that you will be dumb, and cannot be a man who rebukes them, for they are a rebellious house.

3:27 “But when I speak to you, I will open your mouth, and you will say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord GOD.’ He who hears, let him hear; and he who refused, let him refuse; for they are a rebellious house.

Ezekiel’s Commission into Service

Ezekiel’s mission was multifaceted. He was called and commissioned to:

  • Warn the exiles of the impending disasters which were to come on them
  • Show the people of Israel the consequences of their rebellion and sin
  • Prophesy about Babylon’s victory over them
  • Prophesy about the restoration of Israel, and
  • Give specifics about the new temple of Israel

All this was to be shared with people who would not listen to him and his prophecies from the LORD.

In Ezekiel 3, we see God muting Ezekiel’s mouth so He will speak only when he is absolutely led to. This was most likely his preparation time. After we are called into service, there is usually a time of preparation. I call it my PREP TIME!

We live in a fast-paced world. We have trouble waiting and being patient. But, we must.

It is through reading our Bible, listening to spiritually mature people, and waiting on God in prayer we will know what to do, where to go, how to get there, and how to act. We must patiently watch for open doors of ministry.

When God is calling us to do something for Him, He will do what is needed to get His purpose accomplished.

He will:

  • Confirm His will
  • Get us into position,
  • Change our plans if necessary, and
  • Get us going in the right direction

I wish I could say it is always a pleasant experience. Sometimes it is, but in Ezekiel’s case, obeying his call to service wasn’t an easy ride for him, but being obedient to God was more important to him than his personal comfort—as it should be for us too!

Conclusion

A story has been told about an uneducated miner in Scotland who preached among his fellow workmen with great power. “Soon his witness took him far beyond the confines of the mining towns. Someone asked him how he had received his call to preach. He replied, ‘Oh, I had such a burden on my soul for those who did not know the gospel, I argued with the Lord that I had no education and no gift. But He said, to me, ‘Jamie, you know what the sickness is, don’t you?’ I answered, ‘Yes, Lord, the sickness is sin.’ ‘And you know what the remedy is, don’t you, Jamie?’ I answered, ‘Yes, Lord, the remedy is the Lord Jesus Christ.’ And He said to me. ‘Jamie, just take the remedy to those who are sick.’ The uneducated miner said, “That [was] my call to preach.’ ²

God calls every believer to be a servant. What is your calling? Are you willing for Him to show you? Why not ask the Lord to show you now? God may not speak to through a vision like He did to Ezekiel, but He will speak. He always does!

Bible Verses: See above.

Prayer:

O heavenly Father, I so want to do Your will. I want to do anything You ask me to do, but it is scary. I need You to confirm Your presence, show me Your will, and give me the strength and power to follow heed the call You have on my life. Thank you, Lord Jesus. Amen.

Coming Soon:

Ezekiel: When God SAYS “Enough is Enough” at www.GreenePastures.org.

Works Cited

¹ Wikipedia. Babylonia. https://en.wikipedia.org. Accessed 7 June 2017.

² Kolenda, Daniel. The Call vs. the Commission. Charisma Magazine. 14 Oct 2015. http://www.charismamag.com. Accessed 8 June 2017.

³ Barnhouse, Donald. Let Me Illustrate. Grand Rapids: Revell, 1969.

Bibliography

Losch, Richard. All the People in the Bible: An A-Z Guide to the Saints, Scoundrels, and Other Characters in Scripture. Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 2008.

Wiersbe, Warren. Be Reverent: Bowing Before Our Awesome God. Colorado Springs: David Cook, 2000.

Allen, Clifton, ed. The Broadman Bible Commentary: Jeremiah-Daniel. Nashville: Broadman, 1971.

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

#bgbg2

#bgbg2, Christian Living, Life Issues, Politics and Current Events, Testimonies

Hurricane Harvey and Survivor Syndrome

Hurricane Harvey and Survivor Syndrome: Today, I am being completely vulnerable in hopes that my words will encourage someone who has encountered “survivor syndrome” symptoms.

You may have kept hearing, “WE ARE HOUSTON STRONG!” while you sit there thinking, “Maybe Houston is, but I’m not.”

If you have encountered emotional numbness and anxiety during Hurricane Harvey like I have, this newsletter is for you.

Survivor syndrome is defined as, “a characteristic group of symptoms, including recurrent images of death, depression, persistent anxiety, and emotional numbness, occurring in survivors of disaster”—not to be confused with survivor’s guilt which is defined as, “feelings of guilt for having survived a catastrophe in which others died.” ¹

Both these syndromes come in varying degrees. Some dissipate when the disaster is over while other symptoms linger.

What I Have Learned Through Hurricane Harvey

1. I’m not as strong as I thought I was;
2. I stress out easily;
3. I can live for a while on other peoples’ prayers, but it’s not recommended;
4. Too much TV and social media during a crisis are not good for me;
5. Sitting too long hurts my back;
6. Being cooped up in a house for days on days is not cool;
7. Don’t expect me to make rational decisions when I am stressed, and please don’t add to my stress by requiring me to make decisions;
8. I tire more easily in traumatic situations; [More than usual that is.] 9. I should expect palpitations; and
10. I need to become a stronger Christian.

This doesn’t sound like the kind of believer I hoped I would be during this crisis. I’m a little ashamed at my own demeanor during Harvey.

You see, my home did not flood; my roof did not leak; my cars did not get flooded out; I did not walk through waist-high waters; I did not get helicoptered out of my home; I did not have to take my important papers out on a boat; I did not have pets to care for; and I didn’t have to deal with my insurance company or FEMA.

Yes, I did evacuate for a few days due to street flooding and possible higher waters. However, my family could move back home a few days later unscathed.

The news was filled with dramatic rescues in and around Houston—tempered by dramatic losses of all kinds.

Instead of hearing the usual local Houston colloquialisms like . . .

• It’s still under construction;
• It’s close—only 30 minutes away;
• Inside the loop;
• It’s the humidity, not the heat; or
• On the feeder.

I was hearing . . .

• My house is underwater;
• I’ve lost everything;
• I don’t know where to go;
• I don’t have flood insurance;
• Houston combating Harvey looters;
• The bayou has overflowed;
• Harvey continues to bring catastrophic floods;
• The rain is rising; and
• Evacuations are mandatory.

So, What Would I Do Differently or More Intentionally Next Time?

1. Be more prayer-prepared for crisis situations—any kind of crisis! [I need to start today praying for “NEXT TIME.”] 2. Have a preplanned idea of how I can help both others, myself, and our family when the next emergency occurs;
3. Pray and read the Bible more than watching the news and participating in social media;
4. Move around more even if it means walking up and down the stairs;
5. Understand that every person is in a different situation. [I wish I would have recognized early on that my calling during Hurricane Harvey was to care for my 92-year-old mother.] 6. Encourage others to participate in God’s work and validate their calling during times of trauma;
7. Be prepared to share Jesus and His love at every opportunity possible;
8. Recognize that we are all growing in the Lord at different rates and through different circumstances;
9. Give more hope to those facing catastrophic situations;
10. Pray for my church and for other churches to be the hands and feet of Jesus; and
11. Listen to Christian music.

I hope this newsletter touches those who need to hear it. My prayer is that we will all work through this tragedy in a manner that is pleasing to Him. And, that we might grow to become more like Jesus through it all. God uses our circumstances to grow and mature us. Let’s recognize this and be pre-prayed up for the next time.

For my Houstonian friends, we are Houston STRONG! But God is STRONGER! He is great and abundant in strength. His understanding is infinite. He gives us sound wisdom.

And, don’t worry about me. I’m on the road to recovery—Yes, I really am!

Bible Verses:

So, teach us to number our days, that we may present to You a heart of wisdom. (Psalm 90:12)

. . . But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory, both now and to the day of eternity. Amen. (2 Peter 3:18)

For this reason, I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? (Matthew 6:25)

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit.” (James 4:13)

Prayer:

Lord Jesus, I love you. Forgive me for areas I have not been as faithful and strong as I should have been. Help me and prepare me for the next time I encounter devastation. You are my rock. I need You always. Thank You for always being by my side. Be with my friends who have lost their homes, possessions, and livelihood. Send Your ministering angels to them. For it is in in the name of Your son Jesus I pray. Amen.

God bless you.

If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please go to www.GreenePastures.org. If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. And, if you’ve experienced similar emotions, I’d love a comment! Thanks.

Books by Patti Greene: Click here.

¹ Dictionary.com. Accessed 5 Sept 2017.

#bgbg2, Bible Study, Caregiving, Death, Life Issues, Medical, Parenting and Family

Caregiving Part 6: How to Prepare, Embrace, and Survive the Final Moments

Caregiving: How to Prepare, Embrace, and Survive the Final Moments. Ask any recent mother about her child delivery experience and you will not hear the same run-of-the-mill stories. Each woman’s childbirth experience is different. As a point of comparison, there are just as many accounts about the dying process.  Just as we come into this world in our own unique way, we will also leave it in our own distinctive fashion. But, one thing is for sure—we will all die someday. Our life stories will be different, as evidenced in obituaries and hand-me-down family stories. We hate to admit it, but simply stated, death is a part of life.

One day your parents might be sitting on the couch chatting with you. A week or so later, they may be lying in bed struggling with labored breathing and experiencing hallucinations. You may be alarmed with the death rattle you hear in their chest. Shortly thereafter, they might die in your arms or while you are in a different room. But, then what?

When a loved one is close to passing away, we know we will face impending pain, grief, and sadness especially when that final moment occurs. Often times we wish we had time to rest, mourn and cry right after the death of our loved ones—but we can’t. We are thrust into dealing with the practical steps that need to be taken. Being prepared for this moment is tough, but it is by far one of the most important steps you can take.

Commit your works to the Lord. And your plans will be established. (Proverbs 16:3)

Before the Final Moment: Preparing

If your loved one is lucid, having information available will be very helpful to you when the time of death occurs.

iInformation may include:

Instructions pertaining to burial and funeral arrangements, pastoral information, favorite Bible verses or hymns to use at funeral

Location of important documents. Examples include the will, people to notify upon death, personal documents, debts, keys (car, home, and safety deposit), pension papers, bank account information, insurance information, social security number, usernames and passwords, business instructions.

Personal information, e.g.  name of colleges and degrees, certifications, past and current employers. All this is helpful to those left behind for probate, obituaries, and other important duties that need to be carried out.

If a person has been disinherited from a will, it is important to get an explanation in writing as to why in the will. This will help in resolving any disputes and/or contesting of the will.

Signs that Death is Near

As death becomes closer, you might notice that your parent might sleep more, be less verbal, eat less, drink less, encounter more pain, develop changes in blood pressure, experience a change in heart rate, undergo changes in skin, go to the bathroom less, become incontinent, suffer with confusion, experience erratic breathing, exhibit restlessness, endure difficulty swallowing, see visions, show evidence of glazed eyes, and extremities may appear bluish in color.

Saying Goodbye

Knowing when to call the family to say goodbye is difficult to gauge. When you notice symptoms, you may want to let family and close friends know so an opportunity to say a final farewell may occur. Obviously, at this point, you don’t know the exact time that death will occur, but most loved ones would appreciate a “heads up!”

It is interesting that many people have noted that sometimes before death, a person has a moment of lucidity. It happened the night before my father passed away. All the family was standing around his bed. He opened his eyes, looked at everyone and gave the biggest grin ever. It was so remarkable that he knew and loved seeing his family around during his last hours with leukemia. After seeing us all, he clapped for us. What a blessing that was!

Encountering the Final Moment: Embracing

I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever. (John 14:16)

If death occurs in a hospital or facility, the staff will usually guide you as to the steps that must take place.

If the death occurs at home under a hospice situation, there is no need to rush to call the funeral home. As  reminder, “hospice” is not a place—It is a concept. Lingering around your loved one to say goodbye and comfort others is acceptable. When the hospice agency is called, they will support you and the family through your grief. They can also help you by contacting the designated funeral home if you have one. A death must be pronounced by a medical doctor or hospice nurse. Having hospice already in place will help the family during this difficult time.

It is worth mentioning that without hospice, the process will be more complicated. You will be responsible for making arrangement for your loved one to be picked up. But first, you will need to call 911. When an ambulance arrives, you might be asked when the time of death occurred. Be prepared to show a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate Order) especially if you have waited over an hour to call them.

After the Final Moment: Surviving

Request Death Certificates

When my father passed away, the funeral home told us to request at least 20 copies of the death certificates. There will be many instances where you will need them as you clear up their estate, personal affairs, and business. If the funeral home you are using does not supply those to you, they can be obtained by contacting the Vital Statistics office in the state where the death occurred. Most organizations will require an original death certificate, not a copy.

Inform All Financial Establishments

After you receive the death certificates, it will be time to contact all institutions regarding the death. Insurance companies, credit card companies, mortgage companies, brokerage firms, banks and more should be notified.  Be aware that once banks are notified of a death, the accounts are usually frozen until new accounts are set up with the survivors; this may take longer than anticipated, so be sure the family has enough money/cash to get by until this is taken care of.

Get in Touch with Providers

Contact utility companies (telephone, cable, Internet service providers) for cancellation or name changes. It is not imperative to cancel home services such as gas, water, electric, lawn services, pest control until a later date. This will ensure that the home or apartment can continue to be maintained until decisions are made.

Report the Death to Government Agencies

Notify the Social Security office and the Veteran’s Administration about the loss of your loved one. While some benefits might be canceled, others may be adjusted for survivor benefits. If your parents were veterans, survivor benefits may be available depending on the eligibility for you or other family members.

Contact Employers and Former Employers

Contacting current or former employers is essential. The Human Resources departments of these organizations will help you sort out benefits, life insurance, stocks, and beneficiary information. By contacting former companies, you might be surprised to find out that there is a death benefit that you are unaware of. It is your responsibility to find out about that, not theirs!

Probate the Estate

If the deceased had a will, there is usually an executor who is responsible for handling the distributing of wealth and property once a person dies. If there is no will, each state has rules and lists of qualified individuals to help you with distribution. If you have been named an executor, you must show proof of your role before working in that capacity; this is usually stated in the person’s will or an addendum. Depending on the deceased’s estate, it can take up to a year or longer to sort out all the details.

Spiritually Speaking

One simple fact is when our loved one dies, there are no easy answers or exact protocol to follow. There will be pain, grief, and sadness. When the apostle Paul spoke of death, he desired that “according to my earnest expectation and hope, that I will not be put to shame in anything, but that with all boldness, Christ will even now, as always, be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. (Philippians 1:20) As we face our death and the death of our family members, let’s view it as the beginning, not the end—a time to exalt and glorify God. When we envision that our real home is in heaven, it may be a little easier to let our loved ones go.

Saying that we cannot trivialize death. We will miss our parents or family members when they pass away. It’s easy to focus on ourselves and the loss that we will/have encountered both before and after they die. Many people who spend the days, weeks, and months before an impending death giving their loved ones’ support, compassion, love, and care finding it very comforting to their souls.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 states, “There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—a time to give birth and a time to die.” Let’s be prepared for God’s moment and His timing by being wise, fruitful, and loving while we embrace our loved ones’ last days—in both the practical and spiritual sense.

Bible Verses:

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. (Psalm 23:4)

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. (James 1:5)

In my distress, I called upon the Lord, And cried to my God for help; He heard my voice out of His temple, And my cry for help before Him came into His ears. (Psalm 18:6)

Prayer:

Most gracious God. Please be with me as I face the final days of my parent(s). Let me care for them as You care for me. I need Your wisdom, Your grace, and Your peace. I need You now more than ever during this time when decisions need to be made. Let me be pre-prepared—both physically, emotionally and spiritually to know Your will during this difficult time. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited/Bibliography

Preparing for the Death of a Loved One. [2016]: MetaMd. National Caregiver’s Library. Accessed 15 Oct 2016. www.caregiverslibrary.org.

Randall, Clark. 5 Things to Do Immediately After a Loved One Dies. USA Today. 24 Oct 2015. Accessed 15 Oct 2016. www.USAToday.com.

What to Expect When Your Loved One is Dying. WebMD. Accessed 15 Oct 2016. www.webmd.com.

Related Articles:

Keeping Aging Parents Safe

Getting Your Parents’ Affairs in Order

Being Your Parents’ Advocate

Housing: Options for Elderly Parents

Spirituality

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

 

#bgbg2, Caregiving, Death, Faith, God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit, God's Will, Life Issues, Medical, Parenting and Family, Salvation

Caregiving Part 5: Spirituality

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Caregiving. My husband and I moved in with my mother when my father passed away a year and a half ago. Mom is a fragile 91-year-old. Her health is not good, but her mind is phenomenal. Today I drove Mom and her friend to their church for a special service. We stayed afterward for the end-of-the-year Women’s Club luncheon. The women chatted, laughed, and enjoyed fellowship with their friends. You might ask why I chauffer my mother around like this; I do it because I love my mother and I want her to continue to enjoy the church she has attended for the past 50 years. It is there she fellowships with her friends and shares a spiritual connection with others and the Lord.

As a caregiver, our concerns usually center around our parents’ emotional, physical and social life. One aspect often lacking in caregiving is an interest in the elderly’s spiritual life. Whether you are a part-time caregiver or a full-time caregiver, giving yourself to the spiritual needs concerning your parents is truly a privilege.

For those who take their spirituality seriously, a sense of purpose and fulfillment undergirds their lives. Despite this fact, some do not understand or take seriously this component of another’s life. Understanding spirituality is complicated because there are so many scenarios and so many definitions of spirituality at play. They involve answering questions such as:

  • Are you a part-time caregiver or a full-time caregiver?
  • Are your parents living in the same town or city as you are?
  • Are you a strong believer, a ‘sort of’ religious person, or an uninterested individual?
  • Have your parents lived a dedicated life for Christ and the church? Have they attended church sporadically? Or, have they rarely explored any ‘religious’ life?

Once you mix and match all these different dynamics together, it’s time to discern and pray about your part in your parents’ spiritual life. Regardless of your parents’ spiritual background, caring for them is one of the most compassionate undertakings you or your siblings can pursue. Included in regular caregiving responsibilities, being a part of allowing your parents to pursue or continue their interests in God, church, and spiritual growth is an important part of caregiving.

But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. (1 Timothy 5:8)

Your Parents

Many seniors who have attended church all their lives develop a deeper desire for the things of God when they get older; but many do not. Some glide into old age making their spirituality more of an inward feat and not a community feat. In Spirituality and Aging, Sociology Professor Emeritus at Marquette University David O. Moberg says, “Many scientists who study spirituality and aging have concluded that spirituality increases with age. However, it is also important to acknowledge that other prominent researchers disagree with this premise.” ¹ Gerontologists are starting to see how the spiritual life regarding their patients yields an unexplainable peace and calmness as they face the future. As a result, their physical well-being is often affected in a positive way. They see their patients with faith as possessing strength and tranquility regarding their future.

Driving Forces Why Seniors Depend on God

  • Many seniors are concerned about their death and the afterlife.
  • Their faith provides strength as they face illnesses, loss of friends, and loneliness.
  • They have more time to pray and read their Bible.
  • Concern over a reduced income and the ability to meet their needs.
  • A renewed or deepening dependence and guidance by the Holy Spirit.

At a time when seniors tackle new challenges, many undergo losing their support systems. This should be a huge consideration in churches as “baby boomers” are starting to fit into the senior adult category.

Driving Forces Why Seniors Abandon their Faith and Church

  • Lack of activities for seniors—Feeling of alienation may occur when more emphasis is given to youth ministries, young adult ministries, or any ministries besides senior adult ministries.
  • Miss traditions—They feel left out, unwanted, unneeded in the congregation. Seniors enjoy the familiarity of things past, i.e. hymns, Sunday dinners, fellowship luncheons.
  • Difficulty adjusting to change—The new programs and facilities are too much for them. Adjusting to change is especially hard for the aging population.
  • Hearing loss—They can’t hear the preacher or Sunday school teacher.
  • Stimulating services (music, yelling, confusion)—The British Alzheimer’s Society discusses noise triggers by saying, “[People with Alzheimer’s] feel bewildered or anxious because there is too much noise, too many people around, or a change in a familiar routine.”
  • Other disabilities—There may not be handicapped parking or wheelchair accommodations at the church. They may be unable to get to church due to disability or inability to drive themselves. Or maybe, there is too much walking to get to their classes or sanctuary easily.

Caregiving and You

As a family caregiver member, it is imperative for you to be cognizant of your parents’ needs. This includes their spiritual needs.

Practical Ways You Can Help

  • If you live in the same town or city as your parents, bring them to church and church functions.
  • If you live out-of-town, contact their church organization, friends, or other family members to set up transportation.
  • If your parents are in a facility, investigate what kind of spiritual activities that are available.
  • Make their living environment familiar and comfortable, i.e. put their favorite cross in their room, be sure their Bible is easily accessible.
  • Provide notecards, stamps, and addresses so they can write and minister to their friends.
  • Get their hearing checked by an audiologist.
  • Get their eyesight checked by an optometrist or an ophthalmologist.
  • Purchase a large-print Bible for them if needed.
  • And, if you or family members live in the same city or town, be sure to visit them!

Whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen. (1 Peter 4:11)

Questions Caregivers Must Ask

  • What hindrances are my parents facing?
  • My parents used to attend church. Why don’t they go now?
  • How do I approach my unbelieving parents about Jesus Christ?

These are just a few of the many questions caregivers might have. You may want to spend some time thinking, meditating, and praying for what questions need to be asked and how you can be a part of the solution.

How to Pray: Ten Tips for a Better Prayer Life

Keep Yourself in Top Spiritual Shape

Being connected to God’s divine source can help you manage better as your caregiving duties progress. Continuing or starting to seek God’s presence and strength in your life will assist you as you care for and minister to your loved ones. Understanding you are not perfect alleviates a mindset of inadequacy. Remind yourself of all your parents have done for you. If they haven’t done much, it is time to ask God how He wants you to treat them and care for them regardless of the past. God is available to help you as you support your parents. By being their caregiver, you can be assured, God has given you a divine assignment—one that you won’t regret.

Salvation and Eternal Life

On our most recent visit to my mother’s oncologist, we were discussing mom’s diagnosis and future prognosis. In his matter-of-fact intonation, he said, “Mrs. —————, life is a terminal illness!” While we don’t want to think about life like this, it is true. We all will die and face an eternal future.

As we live our earthly life, let us be ever mindful about our eternal destination. Gaining an understanding of our future existence is significant in understanding life-and-death anxieties and angsts.

Both caregivers and parents and all humanity will die. CRU (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ) discusses four laws in the booklet “Have You Heard of the Four Spiritual Laws?” ²

Four Spiritual Laws

Law 1: God loves you and offers a wonderful plan for your life.

John 3:16

Law 2: Man is sinful and separated from God. Therefore, he cannot know and experience God’s love and plan for his life.

Romans 3:23

Law 3: Jesus Christ is God’s only provision for man’s sin. Through Him, you can know and experience God’s love and plan for your life.

John 14:6

Law 4: We must individually receive Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord; then we can know and experience God’s love and plan for our lives.

Revelation 3:20

A Heart-to-Heart Prayer

If you or your parents have not accepted Jesus Christ, now is the time to have a frank conversation with God. If you are unsure how to pray for God’s salvation, a simple well-meaning prayer can be the best decision for both of your lives.

Dear God, I know I’m a sinner, and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe Jesus Christ is Your Son. I believe that He died for my sin and that you raised Him to life. I want to trust Him as my Savior and follow Him as Lord, from this day forward. Guide my life and help me to do your will. I pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen.” ³

If you have accepted Jesus Christ but your parents haven’t, now is the time to have a candid heart-to-heart with them.

Eight days before my father passed away, I had a candid heart-to-heart with him. He prayed a prayer akin to the prayer written above. As we sat on his couch at 5 am we quietly talked together and talked to God. Some may call this a deathbed conversion. No matter what it is called, my father accepted Jesus Christ and God used me to help him make the best decision of his life.

Caretaking means being responsible for various aspects of your parents’ life. As we face our parents’ sundown years, let’s do what we can to help them hold on to, delight in, and agree to take part in their spiritual life while at the same time progressing and preserving our own spiritual life.

Do You Fear Death?

Bible Verses: See above.

Prayer:

Dear heavenly Father, as I consider all the needs of my parents, let me be mindful of their whole being. I pray for their emotional, physical, social, and spiritual life. Make me aware of their needs. Let me offer my help. Give us both peace. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited/Bibliography

¹ Spirituality and Aging. http://www.nap411.com. Accessed 10 May 2017.

² Greene, Patti. Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer. Bloomington: WestBow, 2016. [Permission given from CRU for Have You Heard of the Four Spiritual Laws summary.]

³ Begin Your Journey to Peace. www.peacewithgod.net. Accessed 10 May 2017.

Coming Soon: Caregiving Part 6: How to Prepare, Embrace, and Survive the Final Moments

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

#bgbg2, Caregiving, God's Will, Life Issues, Medical, Parenting and Family

Caregiving Part 4: Housing Options for Elderly Parents

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Senior citizens are living longer. They have access to medical treatments which can prolong their lives. Many “baby boomers” encounter difficult decisions about caregiving and living arrangements for their parents. While boomers are concerned about their parents’ well-being, they are often clueless about what housing options are available.

Evaluating the Level of Care Your Parents’ Needs

Safety Issues – Are your parents safe in their home? Is their driving safe for themselves and others? Are they able to take care of themselves?

Medical Issues – Are your parents able to administer and track their own medicine? What medical conditions do your parents have? Are they showing signs of memory problems?

Social Issues – Are your parents lonely? Do your parents have friends they like to socialize with?

Location – Are your parents happy where they live now? How will changing their current living situation affect them?

Cost – Are your parents financially able to sustain a decent standard of living? Are they able to afford their current housing arrangement?

Many parents are making cross-country migrations, leaving home to live with their children. The Chicago Tribune tells the story of Elizabeth Larson.

Elizabeth Larson, 93, moved from Champaign [Illinois] to be near her son, who lives in Hinsdale [Illinois].

My son said that if anything happened, if I needed him, he was too far away,” she said. She thought he was right. And she knew the solution, and that it would involve her leaving Champaign. Larson was sorry to leave neighbors she liked. But she didn’t have to leave her two closest friends. They had already moved to out-of-state retirement complexes near their own adult children. “So it was easier for me to move,” she said. And “in a way, it was kind of exciting. I thought it would be nice to be near my son. ¹

While it was a nice amicable move for Elizabeth, it can be a gut-wrenching decision for others searching for senior housing options. Moving is a complex and confusing decision. The earlier you assess your parents’ desires and needs the better it will be. By becoming aware of the different housing options available, you may be the biggest asset helping your parents come to terms with their living arrangement. Communicate with them, give them time to consider the options and be kind and gentle as they face one of the most difficult decisions of their lives.

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Most Common Housing Options for the Elderly

Independent Care—Consists of single family homes or townhomes for self-sufficient seniors. They offer security and social activities in their community living setting. Services such as laundry, meals, transportation and social activities are usually provided. They are not regulated by the government. Independent Care facilities have a country club environment. The average cost to rent or buy a home, including community fees, can be up to $2,000 per month or more. They are also called retirement communities, retirement homes, or senior apartments.

Assisted Living—A community which provides 24-hour assistance. The personnel assists with eating, bathing and bathroom use. However, 24-hour medical service is not provided. Their care usually includes laundry, meals, transportation, social activities, toilet care, housekeeping and medication aid. Assisted living communities are regulated by the state. Other names for assisted living facilities are personal care homes, eldercare facilities, residential care facilities, group homes, and community residences. The cost ranges from approximately $2,300-$5,500 per month.

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Nursing Home—A community which provides 24-hour assistance with daily living and medical care by nurses and therapists. Nursing homes include doctors on call, hospice and end-of-life services, medication aid, housekeeping, toilet care, bathing, dressing, transportation, and laundry. Nursing homes adhere to both state and federal regulations. They are also called rest homes, convalescent homes, and skilled nursing facilities. The cost averages between $4,000-$12,000 per month.

Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRC)—Campus-like communities which provide care from private residences to assisted living and skilled nursing care. They are designed for individuals with declining conditions. Many times the residents move from one community to another as their conditions change. The services are the same as nursing homes. CCRCs have some state regulations. These facilities are also called Continuing Care-Retirement facilities and life care facilities. Services and costs vary depending on what level facility one is in.

Aging in Place—Many seniors decide to age in place. This is a living arrangement where the elderly and their children have made the choice to live in the children’s home, their parents’ home or the home of their choice for as long as they are capable. When assistance is needed, nurses, private aides, physical therapists and other needed personnel will come to the home. Many seniors need to remodel their houses to make them suitable to meet their needs as they age. Financial planning is a must to handle living and home and providing for any outside help.  ²

Defining Types of Care for the Elderly

Skilled Care—a type of intermediate care where the patient or resident needs more assistance than usual, generally from licensed nursing personnel and certified nursing assistants. This care is not the same as long-term care, in which a resident may not need the services of a licensed nurse on a daily basis.

Custodial Care—care when seniors need caregivers to help take care of them. Unfortunately, many older adults reach a time in their life when they can no longer care for themselves. They cannot get around the house without assistance. They cannot do the things they once did, as their physical and mental skills are not quite as sharp as they used to be. A caregiver may make all the difference between an older adult struggling with life’s demands and an adult who has a helping hand.

Palliative Care/Hospice Care—a special type of care offered to patients who are at the end of their lives. Both hospice and palliative care centers are about providing the best care possible to their patients.

Hospice care most often occurs in a home environment. Hospice is not a place—It is a concept. A hospice team consists of doctors, nurses, social workers, spiritual personnel, therapists, aides, and volunteers. Hospice does not focus on treating medical problems; rather, it centers on keeping the elderly pain-free, comfortable and happy during their last days. In the Hospice Handbook, Larry Beresford says, “While hospice is care for the dying, it places special emphasis on life and living each day as fully as possible.” ⁴ Eligibility in most hospice programs require an estimated death within the next six months due to the terminality of the patient’s illness.

Palliative care centers around the concept of care also. A nurse is there to lend support to the patient and family and to manage the pain and other symptoms which are affecting the patient. Palliative care usually occurs in a facility such as a hospital, assisted care facility, or nursing home that is associated with a palliative care team.

Due to different policies, It is important to consult with your physicians about what type of care is best for your parents.

Home Care—a type of medical and assisted living in which the care provider works with the patient within their own home. Typically, the process involves an initial meeting between the care provider and patient to determine the personal needs and the level of care required. The care provider and patient will then come up with a personal and customized program to make sure the patient’s needs are being met. The health care provider may be either a licensed professional or a part of a company which specializes in assisted living. Typically, assisted living organizations are comprised of nurses, doctors, and other medical professionals and are assigned to each patient based on their own specific needs.

Residential Care Homes—In some areas, residential care homes are the last resort in terms of finding placement for residents who don’t quite meet the criteria for nursing home care, but may not have the funds for assisted living. Residential care homes also tend to be a good choice for seniors who have mild mental health issues that hinder their ability to live independently or to be accepted into assisted living facilities.

Adult Day Care—places senior citizens into the hands of licensed professionals who are fully capable of taking care of them. For many people, this is a way for the elderly to get out of the house and socialize with other people. Socialization is extremely important; some people could easily slip into depression if they don’t have someone they can talk to.

Companion Care—Companions for the elderly. Companion care personnel are usually trained by their company in safety and CPR. They are also called comfort caregivers. No certification is required to be a companion. ³

Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you. (Exodus 20:12)

How to Pay

Often finding housing for our parents boils down to financial ability to pay for services. Without going in depth, some ways to finance parental care are to use private savings from the parents or children, money from the sale of a home, long-term insurance, reverse mortgages, Medicare or Medicaid, VA benefits, stocks/bonds, or any other financial means family or parents possess.

As children face the prospect of caring for their aging parents, complex decisions about housing are imperative. Each housing options listed above comes with benefits and complexities. It is up to the family to educate themselves on what is available by communicating with them and providing time to formulate a plan that works for all parties involved.

When my father passed away, my husband and I decided to move into my mother’s home to care for her. It was a mutual decision on our parts with the understanding that we would talk if the situation was not working well for any of us. As retired baby boomers, our situation allowed this arrangement. While it isn’t for everybody, it was a mutual decision made in the best interest of both my mother and ourselves.

As you face any upcoming living arrangements for your parents, be open-minded, respectful, realistic and informed.

The expression “there’s no place like home” is true. But, when the time comes when parents need to consider whether to move or not, let’s make sure that whatever plan is crafted creates a secure, comfortable and pleasing environment for all involved.

Bible Verses:

Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen. (1 Peter 4:11)

Cease striving and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10a)

Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. (Romans 5:1)

Prayer:

Dear Lord, As I face caring for my parents, please help me honor and respect them in all decisions that must be made regarding living arrangements. I trust that You will guide me and give me wisdom as plans and decisions are made. Thank you, Lord, for helping me. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Coming Soon: Caregiving Part 5: Spirituality

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited/Bibliography

¹ Older Parents Divulge What It’s Like to Leave Home to Live Near Adult Kids. Chicago Tribune. 5 June 2015. http://www.chicagotribune.com.

² Paying for Senior Care. https://www.payingforseniorcare.com. 5 May 2017.

³ Assisted Living Today.  http://assistedlivingtoday.com. Accessed 5 May 2017.

⁴ McGovern, Sue. What Everyone Should Know About Hospice. St. Meinrad: Abbey Press. 2004. Print.

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Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

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Caregiving Part 3: Being Your Parents’ Advocate

The “rich and famous” can hire a personal health advocate to help them with the issues they or their parents face as they age. These advocates help with access to medication, transportation, and other individual challenges.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines an advocate as “one who pleads the cause of others.” ¹ They speak up for their client when they can’t speak up for themselves. While it would be nice for every elderly person to have their own personal health advocate, it is usually left up to family members to advocate on behalf of their parents and relatives rather than employing a paid staff member to help them navigate through the health and medical system.

Your parents need you and family members to:

  • Become familiar with their rights
  • Work on their behalf
  • Understand the intricacies of the services available
  • Be there to sign permissions, and
  • Resolve and discuss issues related to their healthcare.

Advocacy is essential when your parents reach a certain stage in life where they are unable to keep up with the complexity of the healthcare system. The elderly’s main health advocacy topics revolve around their doctor visits, medication, illnesses and disorders, dementia/Alzheimer disease, and Medicare/Medicaid.

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. (James 1:5)

Make Hay While the Sun Shines: Doctor Visits

If possible, you or a family member should accompany the aged to their doctor appointments. This is especially important if your parents have any cognitive disabilities surfacing. Establishing a relationship with your parents’ doctors and an office is the beginning of establishing an agreed-upon working plan for their healthcare.

Writing down questions for the doctor before the visit is always a good idea. You will want to bring a list of your parent’s symptoms with you to discuss with the physician. No matter how trivial a question might seem to you or your parents, it is important to bring it up so the doctor can piece together the entire picture so the best care is given. However, keep in mind doctors only have so much time allotted for your visit, so prioritize your questions and comments to each physician.

Always bring a list of your parent’s medications to all doctor’s appointments. Medication or dosage may change from week to week, so it is critical to inform every physician visited of any changes to vitamins, prescription drugs, and over-the-counter-medicines. In addition, depending on your parent’s insurance policies, you may want to ask your doctor to prescribe the generic medicine if it works as well as the non-generic.

After your visit, record what the doctor said, fill any new prescriptions, talk about the visit with your parents, and write down the next appointment date in your calendar along with a reminder to call for the results of any blood work.

Here Goes! Medication

Many seniors take an agglomeration of medication. It is a daunting task for them and their caregivers to make sure they are labeled correctly and administered properly.

My mother has a medicine that comes in two dosages. The problem is that the pills are the same exact shape and size. One day she wasn’t feeling well and she noticed an irregular heartbeat. After a little detective work, we discovered that she was taking a double dose of medicine because the two pills looked so similar except for the small inscription on the pill. It was quite evident that this double dose was causing a significant problem for her—one that was easily remedied but not always easy to detect.

Polypharmacy is the term used when four or more medications are prescribed to a patient. Most adults over 65 years of age are taking four or more meds and monitoring all their medicines becomes more difficult. Using the same pharmacy for all prescriptions is advantageous and advisable. The pharmacist will have records of all the medicines taken and whether there are possible side effects and interactions with other medicines. Once prescriptions are received, note the ailment that the prescription is for on the bottle or tube.

If your parents aren’t competent, it will be left up to you—the advocate and caregiver—to manage their medications. If they aren’t able, you or a family member will be responsible for doling out, organizing, and storing their medicine.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. (Romans 12:2)

To help with medicine, it is wise to write what ailment all prescriptions are used for on the bottle or tube. Doing so will not only help you, but it will be useful for anyone who might need to take over distributing medicine to your parents.

Prevention is Better Than a Cure: Illnesses and Disorders

The aged are living longer now than previous generations. It follows, then, that as they live into their 80s, 90s, or even their 100s they will encounter a multitude of diseases and disorders. The most common issues affecting seniors are listed below

Accidents, Health Issues, and Disorders

  • Blood
  • Bone, joint, and muscle
  • Brain, spinal cord, and nerve
  • Cancer
  • Digestive
  • Ears, nose, and throat
  • Eye
  • Health issues and disorders of the elderly
  • Hearing
  • Heart and blood vessel
  • Hormonal
  • Immune
  • Infections
  • Injuries
  • Kidney and urinary tract
  • Liver and gallbladder
  • Lung and airway
  • Men’s health issues
  • Mental health
  • Mouth and dental
  • Nutrition and metabolic
  • Skin
  • Women’s health issues

As an advocate for your parents, you must be aware and discerning about their condition. It is not uncommon for the elderly to fear to tell you of new symptoms that present themselves. They may be concerned about bothering you or they may be justly concerned that you might move them from their home to a facility if it appears they have too many problems. By telling them you are concerned and asking them to be honest with you, they are more apt to mention any symptoms they notice.

If your parents are having memory problems, their ability to tell you about new symptoms may be diminished.

In This World, Nothing is Certain: Dementia and Alzheimer Disease

As we age, nothing is certain. No one knows what illnesses, if any, may be bestowed on them. But, one of the most devastating diagnoses imaginable is when you and your parents hear the words “dementia” or “Alzheimer’s.”

The terms dementia and Alzheimer’s are often used synonymously to represent any kind of changes in the brain which negatively affect cognitive function. However, they are defined differently.

The Alzheimer Foundation of America defines Alzheimer’s disease as “a progressive, degenerative disorder that attacks the brain’s nerve cells, or neurons, resulting in loss of memory, thinking and language skills, and behavioral changes.” The foundation also defines dementia as “a general term for a decline in mental ability severe enough to interfere with daily life. Memory loss is an example. Alzheimer’s is the most common type of dementia.”

The signs were already there with my father. My mother and I noticed them gradually over the years. His confusion, inability to calculate a tip, slower reaction time and forgetfulness became more pronounced. By the time we took him to a neurologist, we knew. But when my father heard the word “dementia,” he was affected. It was his reaction that concerned us the most. He became worried about living and being an encumbrance on us, but at the same time was happy to have a name to put with his symptoms. Everyone reacts differently to the news. And, with Alzheimer’s or dementia, your parents may react differently from day to day!

Speaking specifically to Alzheimer’s, there are changes to the brain that have signs and symptoms. While the symptoms vary from one person to the next, some of the most common first symptoms of Alzheimer’s are: ³

  • Difficulty with word-finding
  • Vision/spatial issues, and
  • Impaired reasoning or judgment
  • Getting lost
  • Changes in personality

Alzheimer’s is a progressive disease. If you notice memory and cognitive changes with your parents, make an appointment with a neurologist. They will be able to discuss your parent’s symptoms with both of you. The physician will ask about the overall health of your parents, give memory tests, look at blood work, and possibly perform a CT, MRI, or PET scan to obtain a probable diagnosis. It is important to realize there are other medical conditions that can cause the same symptoms as dementia or Alzheimer’s and the physician will want to rule those out.

Owen Darnell has written a beautiful Alzheimer’s poem titled Do Not Ask Me to Remember. ⁴

Do Not Ask Me to Remember

Do not ask me to remember,

Don’t try to make me understand.

Let me rest and know you’re with me,

Kiss my cheek and hold my hand.

I’m confused beyond your concept.

I am sad and sick and lost.

All I know is that I need you

To be with me at all cost.

Do not lose your patience with me.

Do not scold or curse or cry.

I can’t help the way I’m acting.

Can’t be different though I try.

Just remember that I need you.

That the best of me is gone,

Please don’t fail to stand beside me,

Love me ‘til my life is done.

All Systems Go: Medicare

Lastly, as your parent’s caregiver, overseeing their Medicare or Medicaid is vital.

Medicare is health insurance for people 65 or older, people under 65 with certain disabilities, and people of any age with End-Stage Renal Disease (ESRD) (permanent kidney failure requiring dialysis or a kidney transplant.

A quick overview of Medicare from Understanding Medicare [medicare.gov] states,

  • Medicare Part A helps covers hospital insurance.
  • Medicare Part B helps cover medical insurance.
  • Medicare Part C is a Medicare Advantage Plan that includes all benefits and services under Part A and B and more.
  • Medicare Part D helps cover the cost of prescription drugs.

Medicaid is a federal system providing health insurance to those requiring financial assistance.

Keeping up with the benefits and changes in Medicare or Medicaid is important because it can affect your loved one’s premiums, deductibles, hospital care, drug coverage and more. It is important not to miss deadlines for signing up and/or making changes that will affect your parent’s coverage.

There may be major changes for both Medicare and Medicaid under the new Trump administration. Reform is always in the works. Being vigilant and knowledgeable of these government programs can affect the health and care of your parents.

For more information on Medicare, click on Medicare.gov.

For more information on Medicaid, click on Medicaid.gov.

One Day at a Time: Wrap Up

Advocating for your loved ones can be exhausting and overwhelming. Your spiritual life can be a real comfort during this season. Acting in Christian love will enhance your character and provide a renewed hope for your parents. Some days will be more trying than others. Praying to be the sons and daughters your parents need will give you strength and help you to set a loving tone each day as you handle the infinite issues involved in your parent’s care.

Your parents need you to help them manage and advocate for them through their doctor visits, medication challenges, illnesses, and insurance programs. Concentrate on short-term goals. And proceed “one day at a time.”

Bible Verses:

So, do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:34)

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. (Proverbs 17:22)

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor. (Romans 12:10)

Prayer:

My heavenly Father, I can get so overwhelmed with all the jobs involved in caregiving. You know I love my parents. You know I care, but I get tired. There is so much to do each day. Give me Your strength and wisdom as I face the challenges ahead. Let me wake each day with a renewed love for You and my loved ones. Let me live day by day in Your presence. These things I ask in Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Coming Soon: Caregiving Part 4: Housing Options for Elderly Parents

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited/Bibliography

¹ Merriam-Webster Dictionary. merriam-webster.com. Accessed 26 Apr 2017.

² “About Alzheimer’s Disease.” Alzheimer Foundation of America. alzfdn.org/AboutAlzheimers/definition.html. Accessed 12 Dec 2016.

³ “Alzheimer’s Disease Fact Sheet National Institute on Aging Alzheimer’s Disease Fact Sheet.” NationalInstitute on Aging. nia.nih.gov/…/publication/alzheimers-disease-fact-sheet. Accessed 4 Apr 2017.

⁴ Owen, Darnell. “Alzheimer’s Poem: Do Not Ask Me to Remember.” alzheimers.net/2013-08-05/do-not ask-me-to-remember-poem. Accessed Apr 26 2017.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

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Caregiving Part 2: Getting Your Parents’ Affairs in Order

As a caregiver, one the most important things you can do for yourself and for your aging parents is to have a conversation with them about their legal, medical, and financial affairs. It is often left up to the children to address these issues and get the ball rolling before a crisis is upon the family.

A story was told about three daughters who tried to have that talk with their mother, but she would always avoid the topic by steering the conversation in a different direction. Their mother then passed away unexpectedly after at the age of 74 after falling down a flight of stairs. Since the conversation never took place, they were left learning that their mother had a mortgage on her house and the bank which held it could not divulge any information to the daughters without a death certificate. The girls found some items where they expected to find them, but then they found their mother’s insurance policy in a knitting bag.¹ Situations like these create frustration and stress as children try to handle the affairs of others before and after their parent’s death.

Often relatives are capable of setting their loved one’s affairs in order. Other times legal, medical, and financial help is needed to obtain the correct advice and documents.

A legal specialty called “elder law” helps families find specific help and advice to ensure their health and wealth is protected from upcoming legal issues, medical decisions, and money questions. An elder care attorney can usually help you see through your parent’s information. The result is an efficient approach to get you going in the right direction. Some families utilize their doctors, their financial advisers, and their own personal attorneys to reach the same goal. Different states have different laws and procedures for end-of-life planning, so it is always best to check what the laws are in your state as some may require a witness, a notary signature, or an attorney signature.

No matter which route you choose, be proactive. With so many terms related to elder care planning, I have chosen to give you a list compiled from various sources that will help you know what might be needed in your own situation. Sometimes the three areas of legal, medical, and financial overlap and other times an issue will fall directly under one category.

But sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence. (1 Peter 3:15)

Legal Terms

Will/Trust – It is essential to have an up-to-date will and/or trust that designates financial, estate, and legal control and distribution. You and/or the elder may have few assets, but even with simple estates, it is generally advisable to have an attorney create a document that will protect the elder’s wishes about his or her estate.

Many people confuse a will with a trust. They both create designations for one’s assets.

Elder Law Answers, a long-term care and planning resource website, distinguishes the two by stating that the main difference is that a will and a trust is that a will goes into effect only after you die, while a trust takes effect as soon as you create it. A will is a document that directs who will receive your property at your death and it appoints a legal representative to carry out your wishes. By contrast, a trust can be used to begin distributing property before death, at death or afterward.

Durable Power of Attorney (DPOA) – A document that grants a person or persons (“Attorney-in-fact”) the legal powers to perform on behalf of the elder (“Grantor”) certain acts and functions specifically outlined in the document. This power is effective immediately and continues even if the grantor becomes disabled or incompetent. The powers usually granted include real estate, banking and financial transactions, personal and family maintenance, government benefits, estate trust and beneficiary transactions.

Advance Directive – Written instructions regarding an individual’s medical care preferences. The forms vary from state to state, but in general, advance directives can include a Living Will, Health Care Power of Attorney or Health Care Proxy, and a Do Not Resuscitate or Do Not Intubate Order (DNR or DNI). You do not necessarily need a lawyer to create these. ²

“An advance directive goes into effect only if you are incapacitated and unable to speak for yourself.” ³

Medical Terms

Advance directives are for people of all ages who might face any medical emergency or crisis. By maintaining up-to-date advance directives, you can be sure the medical treatment you want is carried out. It also relieves family members from making the gut-wrenching decisions that might occur in emergency situations. Be sure your family knows where these documents are and keep them in a handy, accessible location.

CPR (Cardiopulmonary resuscitation) – [Resuscitation that] might restore your heartbeat if your heart stops or is a life-threatening abnormal rhythm.”

Ventilator Use – Ventilators are machines that help you to breathe. A tube connected to the ventilator is put through the throat into the trachea (windpipe) so the machine can force air into the lungs. Putting the tube down the throat is called intubation.

Comfort Care – Comfort care is anything that can be done to soothe you and relieve suffering while staying in line with your wishes.

Hospice Care – [Provides] comfort to you and your family during a life-threatening illness, rather than provide treatments to cure the illness.

Palliative Care – [This is] similar to comfort care in hospice, but it is offered along with any medical treatments you might be receiving for a life-threatening illness.

Living Will – A written document that helps you tell doctors how you want to be treated if you are dying or permanently unconscious and cannot make decisions about emergency treatment. [It is important to note that a living will is different from the legal will mentioned above.]

Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care – A legal document naming a healthcare proxy, someone to make medical decisions for you at times when you might not be able to do so.

DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) – Tells medical staff in a hospital or nursing facility that you do not want them to try to return your heart to a normal rhythm if it stops or is beating unevenly. [Take this to the hospital and be sure your doctor has a copy of this document.]

DNI (Do Not Intubate) – Will alert emergency medical staff in a hospital or nursing facility that you do not want to be put on a breathing machine. [Take this to the hospital and be sure your doctor as a copy of this document.]

Organ and Tissue Donation – Allows organs or body parts from a generally healthy person who has died to be transplanted into people who need them. ³

HIPPA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) – MedicineNet.com defines HIPPA as “a U.S. law designed to provide privacy standards to protect patients’ medical records and other health information provided to health plans, doctors, hospitals and other health care providers.”

To have access to your loved one’s medical records, written permission must be given. Doctors, hospitals, other providers of healthcare have HIPPA release forms for their patients to sign. These release forms authorize all or some medical information to be disclosed to other individuals or organizations. Checking to be sure you have access to your loved one’s medical records is important.

Financial Terms

The time may come when the elderly parent is not able to handle their own finances. This could be due to mental or physical impairment, visual difficulties, falling prey to scams, or the death of a spouse who handled the finances. Don’t be afraid to step in to be sure financial losses do not occur. With the advent of the computers, the elderly may easily transfer money, buy or sell stocks, or give money away without a family member even knowing. You may need to assess the situation and find out what tools will help prevent unfortunate situations from occurring.

Joint Accounts – The elder can add you or another relative to a checking account as a joint account holder. This makes you a joint owner of the funds — both you and your loved one can withdraw and deposit money and write checks. It allows the elder to maintain some independence and control and allows you to keep an eye on things, pay bills, and handle some (but not all) financial affairs.

Single-Owner Accounts with an Authorized Signer – Your older relative can add you as an authorized signer on a checking or savings account, without making you a joint owner. This means you can write checks and withdraw and deposit funds. However, because you are not an owner of the account, all transactions must be made on behalf of the elder.

Automatic Payments – You can ease the bill paying burden by helping your older relative set up electronic automatic payments or withdrawals for monthly bills.

Representative Payee for Social Security Benefits – The elder can designate you as their representative payee for Social Security benefits. A representative payee receives the Social Security benefit checks and is responsible for using the funds on behalf of the elder.

Financial Power of Attorney – With a financial power of attorney, the elder gives another person legal authority to act on their behalf. ⁴

In addition, if your loved one has an Individual Retirement Account (IRA), stocks, mutual funds, or other accounts with financial institutions, a call to those businesses might be in order. They will be able to direct you as to handling the daunting situation you may be facing with your parent’s financial matters.

Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. (Romans 13:7b) www.GreenePastures.org
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Just Do It

Let’s face it: you may not feel equipped to initiate a conversation about the legal, medical, and financial decisions that you may encounter. But, when we approach our elders with kindness, listen to their opinions, and let them know that we are on their side to help them to make these decisions, we can proceed with confidence that we are carrying out their desires.

And by doing so, we are honoring our parents. The apostle Paul summed it up accurately when he writes, “Honor your father and mother. This is the first of God’s Ten Commandments that ends with a promise. And this is the promise: that if you honor your father and mother, yours will be a long life, full of blessing.” (Ephesians 6:23 LB.)

Bible Verses:

The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.” (Matthew 25:40)

The Lord’s bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged. (2 Timothy 2:24)

Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2)

Prayer:

Lord, thank You for the many resources where I can find information to help me with my parent’s legal, medical, and financial needs. Make me aware of information that is pertinent to the care of my parents. I truly want to be the best caregiver I can be. I need Your guidance and help. Let me love like You loved. Let me serve like You served. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Coming Soon: Caregiving Part 3: Being Your Parents’ Advocate

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited/Bibliography

¹ Siegel Bernard, Tara. The Talk You Didn’t Have with Your Parents Could Cost. New York Times, 24 May. www.nytimes.com. Accessed 22 April 2017.

² Caring for Your Parents: Legal Issues, PBS, pbs.org. Accessed 22 April 2017.

³ Advance CARE Planning: Tips from the National Institute on Aging. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. WEB. Accessed 22 April 2017.

⁴ Michon, Kathleen. First Steps to Managing an Elder’s Finances. nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/helping-seniors-manage-money-finances-32268-2.html. Accessed 22 April 2017.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

#bgbg2, Caregiving, Life Issues, Medical, Parenting and Family

Caregiving Part 1: Keeping Aging Parents Safe

There are many issues and facets involved in caring for ones’ parents. The style and attitude of care provided to a parent by a child can vary considerably among the parent’s children. One child embraces caregiving with a total outflowing of love and energy while another could experience a total depletion of energy and frustration. Understanding your aging parents involves many aspects of care, especially caring for their safety.

The Utah Caregiver Coalition defines caregiving as “the provision of assistance to another person who is ill, disabled, or needs help with daily activities. It often requires attention to the physical, mental, social, and psychological needs and well-being of both the caregivers and the elderly person requiring care.” ¹

In a Christian sense, caregiving is a call to serve and give your life to another person. Serving others is a Biblical theme discussed multiple times within the context of the Bible as a virtue for us to strive for and act upon.

Through love serve one another. (Galatians 5:13b) www.GreenePastures.org
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A call to serve others comes directly from Matthew 20:28 when Matthew, the most likely author of the book, wrote:

“Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”

I was privileged to live with my mother and father during my father’s final days of acute myeloid leukemia and dementia. Currently, my husband and I are living with my mother in her home as she faces her own critical health issues. In June Hunt’s book Caregiving: A Privilege, Not a Prison, she shares that caregiving provides emotional and physical support to someone unable to live independently and makes a choice with the heart and mind to give needed support to a dependent person. She also mentions that “Christian caregiving is offered in the spirit of love, compassion, and relationship.” ²

This same spirit is what I am striving for as I face many diverse issues relating to caring for my own mom as she embraces her final days.

Before addressing the safety of your parents, you must first:

  • Understand the aging process
  • Become knowledgeable about the issues facing the aging population
  • Become proactive regarding the safety issues facing the elderly

Understand Aging

Understanding how seniors age is a difficult feat. They struggle with: forfeiting their freedom and independence, becoming forgetful, losing their eyesight and hearing; experiencing mobility problems, encountering depression, and more. College degrees in aging address topics such as age-related diseases, the biology of aging, nutrition, laws and ethics of aging, and even caregiving.

Your parents may develop attitudes or thoughts they may never have had in their younger years. Feelings of loneliness, friendlessness, uselessness, and unwantedness may unfold. These attitudes may appear as them being unsocial, depressed, anxious, irate or sad. Issues such as living arrangements, financial matters, medical treatments and legal issues may become household topics.

I lie awake, I have become like a lonely bird on a housetop. (Psalm 102:7) www.GreenePastures.org
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Too often caregivers have trouble adjusting to their parent’s newfound attitudes and opinions. As children, knowing your parents will help to understand why and how they act. Facing these issues with a sound and patient mind will help your parents trust and adjust more to the uncertain future they are entering.

On the other hand, some seniors are even-keeled, sweet, sociable, and concerned with the welfare of others all the while dealing with these important decisions.

Let’s look at the case of an older woman who seemingly was very competent in coping with what life held for her taken from an article titled “When God Sends Help, Don’t Ask Questions” in Senior News. ³

She hurried to the pharmacy to pick up the medication. When she got back to the car, she found her keys locked inside.

The woman found an old rusty coat hanger on the ground. She looked at it and said, “I don’t know how to use this.”

She bowed her head and asked God to send her some help.

Within five minutes an old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off his cycle and asked if he could help.

She said, “Yes, my husband is sick. I’ve locked my keys in my car. I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?”

He said, Sure.” He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open.

She hugged the man and through tears said, “Thank you, God, for sending me such a very nice man.”

The man heard her little prayer and replied, “Lady I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for car theft.”

The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, “Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a professional.”

Become Knowledgeable

In perusing the Internet, I found multiple tips on caregiving. They came under the titles: Tips for Caregivers, Being a Healthy Caregiver, Caregiver Stress: Tips for Taking Care of Yourself, Tips for Caregivers: Coping with Stress and Anxiety, Helping Seniors Manage Money and Finances, and Caring for Your Parents: Legal Issues, and Medical Tips for Seniors. After immersing myself in these articles, I have compiled some brief tips to help you get started with your caregiving tour de force:

  • Get your parent’s medical and legal information in order. Keep these items in a location easy for quick retrieval. The items and information you want to locate and secure include advance directives, wills, medication lists, birth certificates, insurance policies, estate planning documents, usernames, passwords, and safety deposit keys.
  • Communicate with your parent’s doctors, lawyers, pharmacists, and financial advisors.
  • Have candid conversations with your siblings. Delegate and plan a schedule for shared care even if one person is the primary caregiver.
  • Watch for medical issues that may surface regarding your parents and yourself.
  • Find out what your loved one’s preferences are regarding future living arrangements, long-term care, medical decisions, and legal issues before they are not able to participate in these discussions.
  • Understand you are not alone: You may need to seek out support from others. Realize, however, that unless your friends or relatives have experienced it themselves, they may not be capable of truly understanding your position.
  • Understand that being your parent’s caregiver is not an easy job. It is exhausting and possibly expensive, but it can be the most rewarding experience of your life.

Be Proactive in Creating a Safe Environment for Your Parents

According to the U.S. Consumer Products Safety Commission, “Many older Americans are injured in and around their homes every year. The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) estimates that on average 1.4 million people aged 65 and older are treated in hospital emergency rooms each year for injuries associated with consumer products. Within this age group, the rate of injury is the highest for people 75 years of age and older.” ⁴

Too often caregivers are so overwhelmed they overlook basic safety issues within the home. Some issues of concern here are:

  • Do you need to purchase a medical alert fall-protection system?
  • Do you need to discuss opening their doors to strangers?
  • Do you need to discuss fraud and scams— Internet fraud and telephone scams?
  • Are the shelves in their living quarters secure?
  • Will phone and electrical cords cause a tripping incident?
  • Do you need to discuss what to do in an emergency?
  • Does the doorbell work?
  • Are the rugs on the floor secure?
  • Are there flammable liquids around the house?
  • Are hallways free of clutter for walkers and wheelchairs?

To see a more exhaustive home safety list, click here: https://www.cpsc.gov/PageFiles/122038/701.pdf

Many elderly men and women still drive. Some are capable; others are not. One of the hardest things any person has to give up is their driver’s license because it represents their independence and self-sufficiency.

Caregivers must be actively involved in the driving safety of their loved ones. Sometimes adult children can tell their parents that it is time to relinquish their keys; other times it is best left up to a physician or other entity. Either way, securing the safety of your loved one and those around them is important.

Some discussions to have with the elderly are:

  • Do you know which routes are the safest to take?
  • Have you had your hearing and vision checked recently?
  • Which is the best way to get to the doctor, church, friends, grocery store, and other places?
  • Using a taxi, bus or shuttle if needed.
  • Not driving when an emergency occurs.

To see a more exhaustive driving assessment checklist, click here: http://www.caregiverslibrary.org/Portals/0/ChecklistsandForms_DrivingAssessmentChecklist.pdf

Conclusion:

One of the most important things about caregiving is being informed. I was recently asked to teach a six-week class on Caregiving at my church. At first, I couldn’t believe someone would ask me while caretaking myself, but I did anyway, and it was great!

In preparing for the class I consulted many resources. I read books, websites, and articles on the topic. It was through learning more and listening to others that I felt better able to face the challenge with love and appreciation.

I was tasked with finding an appropriate book for the class. I bought seven books and read through about ten more. I finally decided on the best reference book currently available on the topic and I would like to recommend it in hopes this book might help you.

Morris, Virginia. How to Care for Aging Parents, 3rd Edition: A One-Stop Resource for All Your Medical, Financial, Housing, and Emotional Issues.  New York: Workman, 2014. This book can be ordered HERE from Amazon.

Remember, caregiving is different for each of us. As caregivers, we must learn more to understand the aging process, use various resources to become knowledgeable about the elderly and be proactive in providing a safe environment for our loved ones.

Know that your toil is not in vain in the Lord. (1 Corinthians 15:58b) www.GreenePastures.org
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Bible Verses:

But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. (1 Timothy 5:8)

Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth. (Ephesians 6:2-3)

Prayer:

Dear Lord, help me to be the best caregiver possible. Give me wisdom and a desire to honor you in how I serve. There are so many issues to face. You know my time and my schedule. Let me experience joy as I honor my loved ones. Let me seek knowledge. Let me be wise in my dealings with others. Let me be generous with my hugs and kisses. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

God Bless,

Member Inspirational Writers Alive; Bible Gateway Blogger Grid Member

Coming Soon: Caregiving Part 2: Getting My Parent’s Affairs in Order on www.GreenePastures.org.

Edited by E. Johnson; Bible verses are taken from the NASB if not noted otherwise.

Works Cited/Bibliography

¹ What is Caregiving? Utah Caregiving Coalition. utahcares.org/caregiving-2. Accessed 19 Apr 2017.

² Hunt, June. Caregiving: A Privilege: Not a Prison. Dallas: Hope for the Heart, 2015.

³ When God Sends Help, Don’t Ask Questions. Seniorific News. 13 Jan 2017.

⁴ Home Safety Checklist. Consumer Product Safety Commission Safety for Older Consumers.  https://www.cpsc.gov/PageFiles/122038/701.pdf. Accessed 19 Apr 2017.

If you found this post helpful, please like/share it so others can get the benefit. Thanks. If you would like to receive email notifications of new posts or to receive monthly newsletters, please click here and scroll down on www.GreenePastures.org to subscribe.

Books by Patti Greene

Answer Me: Developing a Heart for Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Awaken Me: Growing Deeper in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here

Anchor Me: Laying a Foundation in Bible Study and Prayer (A Devotional Prayer Journal) by Patti Greene, click here